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Thursday, November 29, 2012

the cake to my diabetic soul.

"The Devil knows just what I like and just how I like it." ~ Deon Sanders

I'm not typically given to quoting athletes but I heard him say this once and it struck me as a deep truth to remember.  So into my quote book it went.

It comes to mind often....surprisingly often actually.  One of those things that makes me aware of the Lord's deep caring of my character.  The Devil may know my buttons to push but the Lord knows me, as a whole person and provides the reminders He knows that I need.

Have you ever taken a class on spiritual gifts? When I first took the class I'd never heard of "spiritual gifts" before, even having attended christian schools all my life.  It was new to me and it opened my eyes to how specially the Lord had been working in my life in a way I'd not been equipped to see before.  My relationship with the Lord became more intimate and I saw that I had a useful purpose in life - I was useful to Him!  It was a major marker in my faith walk.  Like with anything though it can have it's drawbacks.

While taking this class was tremendously positive, it lacked a firm focus on the fact that gifts are only a tool.  We are tools and like a hammer, are only useful if the carpenter picks us up to use us.  Gifts are not individual super powers to be used willy nilly.  They do not make one person more important or special than another.  A hand is no more important than a foot.  We don't praise the hammer for pounding the nail, we praise the carpenter for his skills in knowing just the right tools to use.  It should be the same with us.  We are only as useful as our relationship is close to Him.  The farther we get the more rust forms and we don't quite function as accurately or efficiently as we could.

The farther we get, the more credit we take, the more we depend on ourselves instead of Him.   Suddenly we find ourselves as a hammer on a bench glowing about how wonderful and awesome we are, yet completely useless.  Nonfunctional and totally unaware of how far we've slipped.

Been there, done that.

The thing is, we help each other get there too.  We give each other credit for the amazing things that happen as a result of our prayers.  I'm rambling off target again, I know but stay with me.  When we know what someones gift is, we give them the credit instead of God. We reduce them to that gift, tie them to it and limit them to its use.  People have often referred to me as a "Prayer Warrior".  A title that indulged my gluttonous ego. I loved it and it sucked me in to a place where I felt powerful and singled out......and every time it would cause me to stumble and fall face first into the fluffy frosted sweetness.  My gift became my badge, my identity and then who I was as a whole person seemed to disappear to everyone - including me - except God.  In His wisdom He would pull me away from whatever I was doing and set me back into a sort of "time out".   Seclusion, not isolation, but a quiet time where opportunities for me to put my foot in my mouth were farther apart, compliments were not needed, where silence helped me review and see things with new eyes, talk to Him, confess and repent...again.  Followed by a refreshment and a newly adjusted perspective.  I've been in an extended time out.  He's shown me what ministry He wants me to do and cleared me of assumptions and rules I thought I needed to follow.  He stopped my running after peace and made me sit and experience it as He put it in my lap.

He's shown me my weakness and He's shown me how it is fed.  Compliments and credit.  Now He is teaching me how to turn my weakness into a way to glorify Him.  I've so much to learn to phrase a correction, turn a compliment into a praise of Him...redirecting their attention to Him and off of me.  Some respond with an intense tone that I need to stop being so "humble" and accept the praise and ownership that He has blessed me with "tremendous gifts".   No.  Here is the plain ugly truth:

I am as arrogant and prideful as they come.   Jesus and the Devil both know it too.  Compliments turn me into a fat kid in a room full of cake and no supervision.  Jesus knows I have to turn my nose up at a compliment like its poison because the temptation to stuff my pride with those luscious words is too great a detriment to my diabetic soul.  

How to handle those moments?  I haven't mastered that yet.  Right now I think I verbally flail around until the delectable morsel ends up knocked in the dirt.  It's awkward and ungraceful....and can border on offending.  On the upside I didn't devour it.......though sometimes I do secretly dig it out of the dirt.  While my spirit is covered in dirt filled frosting I turn to Him and don't even have to say "oops I did it again".  He knows.

When you know the Lord has used someone in your life to bless you......affirm them by telling them that the Lord has used them in a mighty way to bless you in your life.  Share it with them but give credit where credit is Him and Him alone.  

"The Devil knows just what I like and just how I like it." 


Blessings of grace and truth, moments of beauty free from flailing.
the Mrs.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

can't escape my own awesome

Okay, so I suck at this whole blogging on a regular basis business.   It's not that I don't think of it, it's just that when I do I start posting in my head and then "oh shiny" and it's all gone like someone bumped the etch-a-sketch and I'm like whatever, it's all messed up and now I have nothing to say.

What have I been doing?  Being awesome.

I know, modesty. I made pickled veggies upon request from a friend.  Apparently they were awesome and that made me awesome and now that's the only reason they are friends with me.  They did it all for the pickles.   See....they say I'm awesome.

These same pickle lovin peeps had a party last friday.  I made vegan sugar free, dairy free banana bread.....oh dear, I don't recommend it.  It tasted great but the texture was....goobery....that's accurate as I can get it.  In the garbage it went.  It was an Xbox 360 party because they just got one.  My guys were beyond excited and I was all oh geez here we go, I'll never hear the end of how awesome it is and they will drive me crazy. I do have to disclose that we currently have a deal going with the Dude.  When he was really sick - I think I posted about this - we discussed with the doctor what his healthy weight range was and the conclusion was that he needed to lose a little over 20 lbs.  She didn't want him doing anything about it until he was back to normal of course but she actually said that an Xbox 360 with Kinect was a great way to go for someone who wasn't really into competitive sports and had a hard time finding purposeful ways to be active.  Doh.  So that's when the guys really started to amp up the "but Mo-om!"  I was all "no way" but as cold weather started to approach and we realized that the Dude needs some motivation we decided to strike a deal.  If he could lose half of the total pounds he needs to lose, we will get the Xbox to help him finish losing the rest.  Once we own it a minimum of 50% of anything played on the system is required to be physical.  In other words, I better not catch you sitting down.  He is doing well so far and I think the party was good motivation now that he has a taste of it.

We played a party game that randomly selected different sports that two teams competed at.  We had two teams of 4.  I was impressed with how accurate the Kinect was in reading the movements.  Also it was awesome to not have to hold a controller.

I am the boxing champ.  I was defeated only once....the very last match when my arms simply wouldn't move right anymore.  It was hilarious and my arms were complete and total jello at the end.  Also, they were sore for days.  Also.....I admit, reluctantly, that I loved it.  It was so cool and so much easier without controllers.

Last night the guys decided to pull out the boxing game we have for wii and start working on their skills cuz momma whooped em both!  So now I have to get back into it to stay ahead of them.  I forgot how fun it is I haven't been working out like that for a long time.  I believe my level of soreness revealed that quite nicely too....   Also....I hit myself in the face several times with the cord.....have I mentioned that not having controllers was really nice?  Guess who's on the band wagon?

I did find this crazy killer core workout that is super easy to do at home, no equipment or anything!
I found it on pinterest and then tracked it to the original posters blog.  WOW.  This chick is ripped and amazing.  Really inspiring.  Check it out here:  The Petite Athlete

The 30-day challenge ends today.  I'm looping back around to start it all over again.  The scripture is great and I feel like I need to work on more of the details of the challenge.  There was this amazing clarity that came through about attitude in general and I really felt that this 30 days ended up being about changing and growing me.  Widening my eyes about my own attitude and becoming more aware of my words and examining what they reflect about what is going on in my heart.   Now I'm going to do it again and try to be more deliberate in the areas that I fell short - the more specific statements and encouragements that were supposed to be delivered to Mr.  I don't think he missed them but he certainly deserves them.

I'll try to be back sooner.

Blessings of challenges met, eyes widened and a great big deep breath of awesome in your day!
the Mrs.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

a random kinda week

Tis a week where routine flew out the window as if it was it's only hope of survival.

Mr is still studying his rear off and is actually ahead of schedule.  He's doing great!  We had our first work dinner - a welcome dinner.  It was wonderful and I couldn't stop smiling and nodding as his regional leader described the way the company works, the culture of how people interact with each other and how families are appreciated.  So much confirmation that this has been the right move for our family in general but even more-so for Mr to be able to merge into this wonderful work environment that so suits him.  Makes the transition even more exciting!  No delusions that the first 2 years won't be difficult but when you know that you are where the Lord wants you, even difficult times come with great peace.

Halloween is over - and I'm grateful. November is here and finally joining its temperatures that arrived ahead of it.

Remember that "Daily Do's" worksheet I made for myself?  I now have 3 100 sheet notepads of it!  I'm kinda excited about that...go figure.  I know....I'm a nerd.  But it is super helpful to have a reference point and all things on one page.  Sure makes my day go more smoothly!   Well....when the rest of the house is normal anyway....which has NOT been this week!

The 30-day challenge is on day 18 now - this morning I realized I totally forgot to read yesterdays!  Whoops!  I've decided that I'm going to loop it and start all over from the beginning when its done.  I love the insights and the daily challenges but I am finding that the broader applications are actually distracting from the more specific actions with my Mr.  An attitude of encouragement toward him is less of a challenge for me, it's one I've intentionally worked on for many years.  It has actually been challenging me in how I treat and encourage the world I encounter.  How I think, speak and generally interact with everyone.  Its really neat how it seems to be affecting all the women in the same way, opening up how their mind works, paying attention to their attitude in general.  The feedback has been really fun to read and quite similar.   In eliminating the ability to be negative and intentionally speaking positive it is affecting how they think, feel and generally interact with people.   VERY COOL!

While I am supposed to be encouraging my Mr....I came home from errand day to find a surprise on the counter of beautiful pink roses and a seriously sweet card from him!  It was so neat!  Then as I finished up putting things away he came up to comment that he had a couple things to talk about and as I rounded the corner there was a little gift bag sitting on the coffee table!  The stinker had run out while I was gone to do all this.  In the gift bag was a new iPod Touch 5!  I was totally shocked and didn't know what to say!  There were lots of giddy hugs and crazy shocked faces from me!  What a neat unexpected blessing!  I do not have a cell phone, nor do I want one but, I did have his old iPod touch.  We are absolutely awful about pictures.  One day our kids are going to give us a really hard time about that!  The ipod simply didn't have enough megapixels to take decent quality pictures and we know that a camera just isn't going to get used.  So his phone and my ipod  are our family cameras.  I had tried ordering prints of pictures I had taken and they couldn't even be printed due to the poor quality.  The Dude started campaigning for mom to get a new ipod so he could get the hand me down. :)  Needless to say, he is THRILLED that mom got a new ipod! HA!

I knew a new ipod would be nice but as I am learning how to better put it to use, I am realizing the greater blessings that comes with it.  The ability to set reminders, organize calendars, send notes and reminders to family, use siri to dictate spontaneous broken brain is so blessed by these applications!  To be able to set a reminder for my son for after school and eliminate the struggle to try and remember it all day is huge!  Yes, writing it down is good but that means I also have to remember to read it and then speak it later....which more often than not doesn't happen during that frame of time it needs to.   I am so excited to have a tool to help me remember things!

I'm feeling good and like getting this week back on the tracks!  I have some organizing things I want to do - new folders and things to revamp my home binder and some cork tiles for the inside of the cupboard.

Blessings on your day for beauty and excitement in all the small things!
the Mrs.