the purge

The purging process is interesting.  Much more so this time than the last.

There is a different thought process this time.  One that has surprised me.  Detaching emotions from things. This has been a hard one for me in the past.  Things tend to help trigger memories for me that might otherwise be lost.  Perhaps this marks a growth point....finally accepting that my brain injury will simply mean that some moments aren't meant to last for me but a memory meant for someone else to hold.  There is a freedom in simply being in the moment and not desperately trying to create something that will last.   There is something beautiful about not trying to secretly put the pieces together in my head, pretending to remember what someone is talking about and instead....simply asking them help me remember.

The first wave of the purge resulted in filling the back of my husbands car.  Books, movies, dishes, clothes and perhaps the item that surprised the most people....my wedding dress.  Yep.  It's gone.  My daughter stripped off a piece of the lace from the waist and that was all she wanted to keep.

How did I do it?  I started asking why.  I asked what the real value was....but NOT the monetary value of the item.   The REAL value, to me, is in the space.  The real reason I'm getting rid of things.   To be free of them, to claim space and peace and less to take care of.  To free my mind of the mental clutter objects hold.

So when I went through the sheets I kept only two summer sets and two winter sets for each bed.  No more. I went through towels and got rid of over 50% of them after finding that I had two stacks that had not been touched in over 2 years.  We now have roughly 8 bath towels for our family of four.  I've now moved several old towels into the laundry area to be re-purposed for rags and dog baths.  I replaced several washcloths that had gotten old and yucky with some that were on sale for $4 for a stack of 4 and purchased 2 new bath towels to round out the number of towels kept to be of equal quality.

I've cleaned out under our bed and gotten rid of a number of things that hadn't seen the light of day in 9 years.  Our unity candle set and stand being one of those items.  I found old post cards I'd kept from my grandmothers things, I originally kept them thinking one day I'd make something neat with them or they "might be worth something".  That is one of those tricks of the mind that gets us to keep junk.  Who defines worth?  I'd invited friends to come and look through the heaps of things I'd purged to see if anyone found anything to be of use to them.   The result was humorous.  They all mentioned that they had caught the purge bug too and didn't want to bring more things into their homes.  Then, one sweet friend started in on "but you can't get rid of this! It's probably worth something!"  Right then and there I felt that tug the world has and as I felt it I laughed.  Here I wasn't being chided about how I was donating an expensive wedding dress to goodwill but that I was getting rid of those old postcards.  "Sell them on Ebay! Bring them into an antique store!"  That's not worth my time.  Suddenly I began to feel very clear about what I considered valuable and what has worth to me.  This wasn't it.   Spending time to research or bring them somewhere had no value or worth to me, it would defeat the purpose of what I was doing.  The value was in them not being in my home.  Not being in my space.  Not being in my home, my mind, or my control.

The value was in cutting the tie.

I'm not sure if I'm talking about this purging process more than I feel like I am or what is happening but there are several people in my life making comments that what I'm doing is spreading.  They are initiating conversations with me about getting rid of things, paring down their belongings and then telling me that it is spreading out to other people they know.  Comments about my strength in emotionally detaching from things and being able to get rid of things that have sentimental value.  ....that one puzzles me.....I'm not sure if it's my perspective that is off, or theirs.  Most of the time the object doesn't have sentimental "value" but guilt attached.  I think I'm starting to sort out what that is for me.  The difference between keeping something I love because it has a pleasant memory and keeping something because whats attached is "how could you get rid of that?  It was _____'s!"  The fact that something is silver, gold, crystal or was previously owned by someone is of no consequence to me.  An object is only as valuable as the level of enjoyment I have in it.  That is it.  I no longer want to keep things because someone gave them to me and might be offended if I don't keep it.  If that's why something is on a shelf then the only thing on display is guilt, not beauty and certainly not enjoyment.

The first load of purged items are now gone.  I've taken a few weeks to enjoy the last bits of summer, a week away with family, allowing my body to rest after another bout of pain and reflecting on where I am with Him.....where we are together and what He is teaching me in this process.

School starts next week and I'm looking forward to the structure that provides to the day.  The time and solitude it lends.  I'm excited to get back into purging more of the house as well....maybe even more, what I will learn in the process.

Blessings,
the Mrs.

a random kinda week

Tis a week where routine flew out the window as if it was it's only hope of survival.

Mr is still studying his rear off and is actually ahead of schedule.  He's doing great!  We had our first work dinner - a welcome dinner.  It was wonderful and I couldn't stop smiling and nodding as his regional leader described the way the company works, the culture of how people interact with each other and how families are appreciated.  So much confirmation that this has been the right move for our family in general but even more-so for Mr to be able to merge into this wonderful work environment that so suits him.  Makes the transition even more exciting!  No delusions that the first 2 years won't be difficult but when you know that you are where the Lord wants you, even difficult times come with great peace.

Halloween is over - and I'm grateful. November is here and finally joining its temperatures that arrived ahead of it.

Remember that "Daily Do's" worksheet I made for myself?  I now have 3 100 sheet notepads of it!  I'm kinda excited about that...go figure.  I know....I'm a nerd.  But it is super helpful to have a reference point and all things on one page.  Sure makes my day go more smoothly!   Well....when the rest of the house is normal anyway....which has NOT been this week!

The 30-day challenge is on day 18 now - this morning I realized I totally forgot to read yesterdays!  Whoops!  I've decided that I'm going to loop it and start all over from the beginning when its done.  I love the insights and the daily challenges but I am finding that the broader applications are actually distracting from the more specific actions with my Mr.  An attitude of encouragement toward him is less of a challenge for me, it's one I've intentionally worked on for many years.  It has actually been challenging me in how I treat and encourage the world I encounter.  How I think, speak and generally interact with everyone.  Its really neat how it seems to be affecting all the women in the same way, opening up how their mind works, paying attention to their attitude in general.  The feedback has been really fun to read and quite similar.   In eliminating the ability to be negative and intentionally speaking positive it is affecting how they think, feel and generally interact with people.   VERY COOL!

While I am supposed to be encouraging my Mr....I came home from errand day to find a surprise on the counter of beautiful pink roses and a seriously sweet card from him!  It was so neat!  Then as I finished up putting things away he came up to comment that he had a couple things to talk about and as I rounded the corner there was a little gift bag sitting on the coffee table!  The stinker had run out while I was gone to do all this.  In the gift bag was a new iPod Touch 5!  I was totally shocked and didn't know what to say!  There were lots of giddy hugs and crazy shocked faces from me!  What a neat unexpected blessing!  I do not have a cell phone, nor do I want one but, I did have his old iPod touch.  We are absolutely awful about pictures.  One day our kids are going to give us a really hard time about that!  The ipod simply didn't have enough megapixels to take decent quality pictures and we know that a camera just isn't going to get used.  So his phone and my ipod  are our family cameras.  I had tried ordering prints of pictures I had taken and they couldn't even be printed due to the poor quality.  The Dude started campaigning for mom to get a new ipod so he could get the hand me down. :)  Needless to say, he is THRILLED that mom got a new ipod! HA!

I knew a new ipod would be nice but as I am learning how to better put it to use, I am realizing the greater blessings that comes with it.  The ability to set reminders, organize calendars, send notes and reminders to family, use siri to dictate spontaneous things.....my broken brain is so blessed by these applications!  To be able to set a reminder for my son for after school and eliminate the struggle to try and remember it all day is huge!  Yes, writing it down is good but that means I also have to remember to read it and then speak it later....which more often than not doesn't happen during that frame of time it needs to.   I am so excited to have a tool to help me remember things!

I'm feeling good and like getting this week back on the tracks!  I have some organizing things I want to do - new folders and things to revamp my home binder and some cork tiles for the inside of the cupboard.

Blessings on your day for beauty and excitement in all the small things!
the Mrs.

organizing my thoughts...

...and my day.

Yesterday was one of those days where I wish there was some kind of Bean-O for the brain.   I couldn't seem to maintain any train of thought and caught myself just sitting there or wandering trying to figure out what on earth to do next.  I wanted to do none of it.  It was the brain fartiest of days.

So in an attempt to wake the sleeping hamster in the wheel I had two cups of coffee.  It didn't work.  Yes, I know, I "gave it up" but I'm not blindly cutting things out for all time so that I feel restricted.  I'm making choices.   Coffee is not a "can't" it's a "I don't want it daily".  Though, in the last week I've been hitting that slump that comes when sleep hasn't quite been as restful or long as it should be for too many days.  So I've been reaching for what is easy and tastes oh so yummy.   So yesterday, in a brief moment of coffee induced clarity, I realized that the coffee was probably part of the problem.  My water intake hasn't been where it usually is either.  I've not dropped to a point where I can push the precious save button on the scale in a couple of weeks and I've not been as organized in my work day as I'd like to be.

Time to get organized!

I use a planner and calendar.  But that really isn't enough.  I have my pre-made seasonal schedules that are a great guide but on a day to day basis - especially while so much is still shifting in this season of transition - I need something daily that I can modify.  There are scriptures I feel drawn to spend time in, blog posts I think I should write, people I should connect with and because it is basically just floating around in my skull it's not happening.  What I do know is that when I get really organized and get it out of my head and visually onto paper, I am much more efficient with managing my day, time and tasks.  The wonderful result is that my interactions with people become deeper and more intentional.

I need something daily.  Something to fill out and check off as I go.  Yep, I ended up on Pinterest.  I know.....you knew it.    I ended up at Simple Mom and found her free printable "Daily Docket".  It was oh so close to what I wanted but needed some modification to fit my goals.

Yep.....I'm a technological genius and have no idea why this came out sideways.  Nor how to change it.

But I'm guessing you can get the idea.  Basically this is my first try and I already have modifications I want to make.   Essentially what you see is: Top left - water intake.  I use 20oz bottles so I have 3 water glasses to check off.  The narrow bar on the top right is for the day or date.  Left column: "training ~ focus" is for a scripture or thought that I'm focusing on.  Right now that would be the verse of the day for the 30-day challenge. "Events" - meetings, tests, birthdays etc - highlight items to be aware of.  "Priority Items" - things that need to get done if nothing else does. "Daily's" - this would be where my seasonal schedule comes in.  Here is where I will put my regular daily household tasks.  These are to be done first before other tasks, I'll get to that one in a minute.  Right hand column: "meet Me here" - scripture, devotional, whatever I'm pulled to or working through.  "Whats for dinner" - I think that one is easy....but there is also a "prep" spot there so I know if I need to pull something out to thaw or the prep might take extra time.  "Connect with" - emails, phone calls etc.  "Organizing extras" - this is the project area.  The space where those random things creep into the day that I want to tackle but distract me from my "daily's".  Now, I can write it down and once the daily's are done, I can move on to this spot.  "Tomorrow" - things that didn't get done, extras I don't want to forget or just reminders.  The bottom has a "sometime this week" spot for random things.  

I'd like to redistribute some of the space, the "daily's" box is larger than I need and a "Notes" area would be helpful so I don't have random notebooks all over with things written that I find a month later....  Keeping things in one place where I can address it and organize it in conjunction with my planner will stream line things and free up extra time that I would otherwise spend wandering about the house between chores.  Not to mention the amount of notebooks lying around.  I might even get more of those "52" things checked off! 

Today will be the test run, notes on how to modify it and such and see just how much it helps.  Granted today is not a day full of tasks.  I'll be pickling veggies at the request of a friend but today is officially "food processing/cooking day" so it works.  I don't always use it as such but today I will. 

Blessings for organized productivity to you, with dashes of inspiration.

the Mrs.

When the Lord comes knockin, you best be ready.

Oh how the Lord speaks and makes me laugh!

Remember how earlier today I said I minister at the kitchen door?  Remember how I said I'm in a new comfort with myself and that in the summer I do not achieve anywhere near the productivity I intend and things get all out of whack?

Apparently all of these needed extra highlighting and emphasis today.  This morning I intended to take advantage of the morning by getting on the treadmill.  So I skipped the shower and intended to take one after being on the treadmill.  I intended to do the dishes after said shower so I would have enough hot water.  I also intended to make a to do list, start the bible study book I received last week, get the laundry folded and figure out how the carpet cleaner (which was purchased 2 months ago) works, as well as start getting the next few months of calendar ready for the start of school so we are organized going into it.

Here's what actually happened.

I ended my blog post by following up with a couple emails, checking facebook and dropping in on Pinterest. Found a pin on organization which lead me to this post on 52 weeks of organizing where I fell in love and printed out the form to make my own list of 52 organizing projects.  I read a bit there and then my guts told me they hadn't eaten yet, so I had elevenses (yes, that's a hobbit meal reference and I use it often and well) at 10am.....the irony is not lost.  After lunch I decided I needed to get on to figuring out the calender issue so that I could give a proper answer on whether I could babysit for a friend in August.  Putting my calendar together is time consuming with all the different things that need to be consolidated (2 different school district calendars, Mr's work/golf/etc, church, birthdays/anniversaries and WT's parental rotation schedule).  The Dude arrived home from school while I was in the center of a calendar whirlwind.  He was barely done with lunch when his buddy called to come play.  

At this point I considered that I should set things aside and just get to doing other things.....intended things.  But not wanting to leave a project unfinished ignored all else....hmm....no to-do list means no ta-daaaa.  


So an hour or so later the buddy's mom arrives at my kitchen door.   Filling me in on a host of trials going on for their family.   I attentively listened and expressed as much encouragement and understanding as I could to someone I'm not well acquainted with and therefore was unsure of what she may need in the moment.  The homemaker in me was horrified as my unshowered self stood before the mother of my child's friend, in my SO messy kitchen with the garbage to the top and the recycling poking out (which is of course located in direct eyesight of the entry we are standing in) which was only to be topped by our very senior aged dog walking behind her to vomit in the doorway right behind her.  No, I'm not kidding.  As I dragged the old dog to the back door to let her outside, in case there was anymore to come up.....I found a present to top off the beautiful experience.  One of the little dogs had decided at just that moment to take a poo right there on the kitchen floor.   Mortified.

Yes....here in one fell swoop I had an opportunity to minister a new person at my kitchen door while cleaning up poo and vomit off of my kitchen floor, unshowered, hair a mess, no makeup, trying to push dirty vomity poo filled paper towels into a too full garbage can while trying to reassure an overwhelmed mother that her son can come over any time and to please let us know how we can be helpful.

Really?  I am surprised she let him stay after she left.   After she left and I had time to sit and think about it....all I could do is laugh.   Quite the reality check sent in affirmation.

Yes - you do minister at your kitchen door.
Yes - you've gotten comfortable with who you are enough to pick up poo and vomit off the floor in your too messy house and not be overly apologetic or completely insecure about your place in humanity.  You did it with grace and without panic or frustration.
Yes - you have slipped in your duties.  Yes, you have allowed your home keeping to fall out of priority.  
Here is your moment of awareness that you are indeed in a very good place but your inefficiency at your work can compromise the opportunities I give you for ministry, the ones you are very aware are spontaneous.  It is your job to just be ready. 


Father forgive my procrastination and laziness!  I have full confidence that You can turn this messy moment into a good thing.

There's my confession for the day.  I was an unprepared mess when the Lord brought someone knocking.  I have fallen down on the job and need to totally reassess how I manage my time in an effort to bring balance to keeping home and mommydom.

Blessings of preparedness for when the Lord comes knocking unexpectedly......with the laughter and smile to go with it.
the Mrs.

a new era welcomed

The winds of change are coming.  I can feel them.  Transition into a new season for our family.

No more elementary school.  No more need for babysitters. The boy has a J O B for goodness sake!

Wonderteen will be a Junior.  11th grade.  Amazing to think my tiny little pumpkin head has grown into such an amazing and beautiful young woman.

Mr and I are entering into a new era.  Older kids.  More freedom to be spontaneously social and building a new core of relationships.  Our marriage continually growing stronger....and in a way makes me laugh at how we've grown into this beautiful relationship that also mimics the intensity of young love.  We often tease our daughter and her boyfriend about that high school love where things are so intense you immediately miss each other when out of sight.  Time apart can be crushing.  Oh the days of young overwhelming love! ...and we discuss on a fairly regular basis how wonderful retirement will be when we can be together all the time or his regular comment that if only we could win the lottery so he could be home with me everyday.  The million times we say I love you, sometimes less than 5 minutes apart...yes, that is our truth.  We are silly, cavity inducing, head over heels crazy for each other.  And we don't care how many times people tell us to get a room. Our affection is not hidden, nor excessive.  We keep it G people....maybe PG sometimes. :)

In this new era the trappings of formal ministry obligations have been thrown off.  The kind that tie you to a place, time and topic.  Nothing wrong with them, I'm not being critical of formal ministry.  As I've gotten older I have become more and more aware that I am personally in a constant state of ministry.  Some refer to my maternal nature with those around me.  It brings me to minister to whomever is in front of me at the time.  It isn't conscious or premeditated.....it is simply how He has grown me, wired me.  Formal ministry wears on me more quickly than I'd like to admit because of this.  My ministry is my family, my home and whomever may be placed in my path.  Facebook is so trivialized but I have spent more time ministering to people on there than you may believe.  I minister via email and kitchen door.  Yes, I have a young man who just shows up at my kitchen door, unannounced and just to talk.  He is 20 years old now, he calls me mom and has been showing up for several years.

Perhaps is the natural growth of being in the second half of my 30's.  Or maybe it's that I'm in a season in life more typical for one in their 40's. Maybe it's my confidence coming forward with over 30lbs shed.  Either way I feel a new settling in myself.  A disinterest to please simply for the sake of keeping others happy or not tarnishing someones view of me.  Who they think I am does not make me who I am....anymore.  Its a lovely freedom.

I will probably always be a one track person.  Whatever current focus will probably always be THE big deal until it isn't anymore.
I am not a crafty person.  I won't pick up scrap booking or stamping.  I am capable of crafts but that does not make me crafty.
My kids school work will still be mostly thrown in the trash.  Because who really looks at their spelling tests from 4th grade?  This isn't a treasure to me.  Exceptional works of art from them, yes.  Essays that depict who they are or their unique point of view at the time, those are things I will keep for them.  The funny, the deep, the personal, the beautiful.  Perhaps that's cold.  Though I take great pride in watching my 11 year old purge objects more efficiently than any adult I know because he doesn't form deep emotional connections to objects.  He loves people and that is where love should go.
I'll always have a horribly immature sense of humor.  And that is okay.
I'll always be strong and stable.
I'll always have a heart that breaks easily.
I'll always be a homebody who loves, loves, loves solitude and quiet.
I'll always be passionate about the truth but frustratingly calm and non-argumentative.
I will always care about doing what is right more than what is popular.
I will always be trying to grow and improve and learn about something.

There is unknown on the horizon but it's not scary.  The Lord always has a plan and it is always amazing.  The only plan I have is to try and walk through it with as much joy and grace as I can, no matter how things feel.  Feelings are deceiving and often not rooted in truth.  A fact that is hard to remember when we are in the middle of them but it is something good to remember.

It's been a good couple weeks here.  Lots of fun, lots of crazy and lots of me remembering how every summer I think I'm going to accomplish SO much and never do because I simply can't get it done while my kids are home.  They want attention and talk time or maybe just hanging out not talking time.  If that is what they need then that is what I try to give them, with measures of work in between.  The school year is my most productive home keeping season.  This year I hate to say even the garden has not been tended to the way it deserves.  It has been a disgustingly hot and humid summer though.....I have not wanted to even venture out there.

Time to get some work done.  This is the last week of summer school and Wonderteen is off on a trip with her mom and girl scout troop this week.  My last week of any alone time.  I want to make the most of it!

Blessings of peace and calm to welcome whatever new era comes to greet you.
the Mrs.

"You've ruined me!"

My teenage daughter tells me this all the time.

It may be the highest compliment I receive.

"No ones banana bread is as good as yours!  I hate guacamole - but I LOVE yours!  I hate baked beans - but I LOVE yours!!  You've ruined me!"  She says to me...more than once a month.  

Recently I was making something totally new....I don't remember what it was now....but I was on the phone with her and telling her I was nervous it would be totally gross.  "It can't be YOU are making it, it will be awesome."  If you find planet wonderful - this is where my kids are from.  Seriously.

This weekend is her Sweet 16 party.  BBQ, Bonfire, girls sleeping over in the big tent and in the morning.....a mockery of all things "Sweet 16" has been made to be.   They will be getting themselves totally fanified and beautiful in the twirliest of dresses.....to go bowling.  Just one reason we call her WonderTeen.  She is brilliant, beautiful and hilarious all in one.

And all this falls right during the "Great Purge of 2012"......I am crazy.  Driven there by the messes and the sweetest of requests to make all her favorite "you've ruined me" things.  The Purge is on pause.  The house certainly better for how far we've come but priorities are priorities, right?   This week I am cleaning and putting things back together, cleaning up the purged messes, sending donations with the hubby to drop off after work.  

Today is baking day.  Raspberry Lemonade tartlets.  English toffee.   My famous baked beans.  3 kinds of muffins for breakfast.   I think I'm forgetting something.....oh, guacamole will be made fresh on Friday.  Right now it smells of toffee in the house......

So yummy!

Lots of foody things are happening here.  I'll share next week when I have more time.

Til then....

Blessings of abundant awareness of all the treats He prepares for you, 

the Mrs.

Breaking up....it's not me, it's you...

Coffee.  I love it....hot or cold but doctored into creamy sweet submission.  It is a delight to the senses of sight, smell and taste.  I think I'd drink it all day if I could....and not get fat or incredibly jittery.

Yet, we've been "on a break".  Last week I altered my coffee consumption.  A cup one day, none the next.  Reason?  Attempting to see if my physical and mental function is affected by the delicious nectar.  Pain and discomfort has been loitering around more than usual.  My brain running at a slower pace and the afternoon crash has been hitting harder.  So I felt prompted to experiment....with a potential break up.  "Time apart to evaluate".

The conclusion?  Yeah.....coffee, while oh so smooth and suave, smelling wonderful and oh so sweet.....isn't good for me.  It doesn't enhance my thinking or even allow me to maintain the way I thought it did.   It slows me down, adds too many calories and pushes me into a foggy, but tasty, swirl of thought.

On the days we didn't speak but merely passed in the kitchen as it went out the door with my husband....I found I felt clearer, more steady and certainly more productive in my day.  On the days we started together, I was off track, unproductive, more distracted, oh so tired and all together not my best.

So last week was every other day.  This week, so far, only the sip needed to taste if Mr's cooler has been mixed right.  That's it.

Coffee.....I'm glad we can be civil but I'm breaking up with you......for your cousin, tea.  It's not me, it's you...perhaps it's in your processing or just in your nature.  You just aren't good for me.

Green tea, black tea, lemon water, detox water or a combination of green, lemon and detox.  Black tea to replace coffee and it takes less than half the cream and vanilla syrup to revive the memory of coffee.  A way to not feel totally deprived of something so yummy.  Yet, my brain still feels clear and no crash.

The next step in the experiment...how long will it take before I see the full effect of this break up?  

In other foody news.....I spent all day in the kitchen yesterday.  The refrigerator was cleaned, veggies were chopped and food was cooked.  A huge amount of peppers and onions were cooked for fajitas, and entire chicken was roasted and shredded for the boys, cilantro lime rice was made, cumin spiced black beans were sauteed, fresh pico de gallo was made and avocado, red cabbage and cilantro was chopped.  Today I'll be peeling and cutting up several apples and seeing what else I can think of doing.  Ease of use was my thought.  Need more plants and when they are easy and quick, they get eaten.  When they get eaten in large doses, I feel better.

So....breaking up wasn't so hard to do.  Not like I thought.  No headaches....cravings yes...but no headaches or crabbiness like so many people talk about.  Not too shabby.

Blessings to you for clarity to see all the wonder of life and the brilliance in who and what you are,
the Mrs.

efficient dream

The easy flow of a rhythmic routine.

The steadiness of moving from one task to another.

Knowing the timing of your day.

These are just a few things I would love to be in my day.  I want one day to be able to move through the tasks of keeping my home without thought because they are like the blood in my veins...a part of me that requires no conscious thought.   Learning and modifying, adapting to changes and new awareness of how things work best in our season of life, my day, my issues.

Don't accuse me of striving for perfection....not true.   I strive for improved.  "Good, better, best"....when I know better I want to do better and I will only do that by trying.  Its like anything you want to improve upon, you must practice - but not to be perfect....to do your best.   I don't feel I do my best.  I am the picture of inefficiency.  I flit from task to task, often leaving the last unfinished....not intentionally.  I am excellent at making lists and horrible at following them.

I dream of the day where I can meander through my day on auto pilot, merging from task to task easily and without thought.  Loving what I do, even if my head is under the toilet.  To feel the easy rhythm of a finely tuned routine and be interrupted without a surge of panic that things won't get done....but to welcome the interruption with open arms as the most important thing in that moment.

Today, I decided that coffee would be taken from my menu.  Gasp, I know, I am too.  Currently my brain feels as though it's in a tub of water and someone has carelessly bumped it quite hard.  Yep....it feels a bit sloshy....maybe that's not a proper word but I'm going to use it anyway.  It fits.  I decided that since there is really nothing really redeeming about coffee...from a nutritional stand point.....especially considering that I can't seem to stand it without loads of coffee syrup and cream......perhaps I should try tea again.  It is so good for you.....maybe I'll see some benefit either in clarity of thought or in removing that mid afternoon slump.  It's worth a try anyway.  

Underwater blessings to you for a clear and efficient day,
the Mrs.

a different monday.....a break to reboot and rekindle

Time for a switch.  I think I've been taking mental multitasking to a whole new level.....at least for me.  I need to slow it down and cut a few things out.  I determined that I'm taking a vacation from weight-loss.

What does that mean?  No counting.  No treadmill - unless I have a genuine desire to....but lets be real, it's unlikely to happen.  No pressure.   My LIFE is about paying attention to food, what I eat, how much I eat, when I eat, how it makes me feel, what ingredients have changed and how I need to counteract it all.  It's a full time job all on its own. I think I need to step away so I can return with a refreshed desire for the goal.  The family challenge that we set about a month ago is off.  No one was really taking it seriously and it didn't have the motivational desire we thought it would.  Mr is going to continue to do his own thing and keep going.

I'm still going to weigh in every Monday like I have for the last year.  I'm not going to report it here for now though.   I'm still going to be watching what I eat and how much but I'm going to be focusing in a bit more on the balance of plants to grains....less of the white food and more of the colorful stuff.

Yesterday I watched "Food Matters" and "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead"  and rebooted my attitude with food and why I need to be vigilant about what I eat.  Along with my attitude, my passion was rebooted.  I think that is something we all need from time to time.  We can get into a rut with our routines and the monotony of our own normalcy.  The shine and the passion can dull a bit bringing the need to go back to the roots, the beginnings of why we do what we do.  Renewal is good.  I really don't have a choice about how I eat, but I have a choice about how I look at it....what my attitude is.  These were excellent films on their own but they were especially good reminders for me.  A rekindling of the passion and joy that is found in eating natural whole foods and squelching the feeling of it being work.

My attention is needed in more important areas than my waistline. The Great Purge of 2012 must go on as well as the reorganizing that needs attending to.  As our family merges into a new era of life, its time to re-evaluate the efficiency of all the areas in our home so we can move into the next season ready to take on all the new challenges it may offer.  The Dude has his room re-do coming up - now that colors have finally been chosen.  We are in the very early stages of planning a screen porch build on the back patio....we will be building it with the generous help of friends time and energy.  We are planning a sweet 16 birthday party for our WonderTeen and there is just so much family goodness going on in all these things.

For now, this season, my focus is on slowing down.  Doing what I do with intention and joy. Purging not just our home of clutter, but my mind of hurry and life of excess.  Loving the process and the people it's all for.

While "weight-loss" and I may be on a break, I think I'll have lots of other things to chat about.

Blessings of a slowed down love bringing you back to your roots,
the Mrs.

weigh in monday - where oh where has the determination gone?

+.6.....I could use the excuse that I didn't get on the treadmill last night because my pelvis appears to not want to play nicely with the rest of my body and walking would not have helped.   BUT if I'd lost what I should have during the week then yesterday shouldn't have made a difference.

What happened to determination?  Not just mine either.  No one in this house appears to be taking losing weight seriously anymore.  No one is counting or watching the clock, making sure we don't eat past a certain time.  When did simply not gaining become praiseworthy?  This is silly!  We had goals!  We were motivated and determined!  Now there seems to be this slacker attitude that the minimum effort is good enough.  TWO POUNDS used to be the goal for ONE WEEK.....now, oh well that it's taken a month to lose that with the yo-yo weigh ins.  

This team needs a cranky coach to yell and put us in our lazy places.  BENCHED!  Though...technically that would defeat our particular purpose...

It seems to be a weird season right now....filled with milestones, full calendars and an abundance to be thoughtful about.  Spring simply won't fully emerge here and I've yet to start even one seed.  Our beautiful daughter is going to be sweet 16 one week from today - the party is delayed due to a crazy weekend calendar but still it needs planning.  As I dropped off our son this morning, I realized that the end of my driving him to elementary school was in sight....middle school is ahead.  Mr has been working like a mad man and putting in all sorts of crazy hours just trying to keep up.  There is our shift from "Home for now" to "this IS our home" and lists are being made for the various modifications, repairs and improvements that we'd like to accomplish...eventually (thanks to pinterest we have some visual aids).  First, we must decide what we can and want to accomplish this year.  I'm sure it will take years to get through the list but taking it out in manageable chunks each year will help.  We are purging the house like crazy...already about 4 storage tubs are filled.  SO proud of the kids for parting with things instead of hoarding their possessions.  It's the Dude's year for a bedroom remodel, WonderTeen had her's for her 10th birthday and now it's his turn. I love the idea of a more grown up room at those pivotal growing seasons - creating an environment with them that reflects who they are and can grow with them.   Softball season is starting for Mr, and there is golf league too.  A garden project at church.  Holidays and birthdays for important people coming up....

I'm sure there is more.....for goodness sake no wonder I can't concentrate on anything.  My brain doesn't know how to juggle!  Time for some serious lists and organizing.  Some delegating too.

Determination - I need you and your buddies energy and motivation to move in and kick some rears into gear!

Guess I'd better get to it!

Blessings of determined successes to you,
the Mrs

beginning the great purge of 2012

Storage tubs are set out upstairs and down.  I've begun.

Funny thing is, I am seeing my perspective change.  Things I've kept because they were someone else's....but don't hold a true purpose...don't hold meaning anymore.  Now, they are space invaders.  I also found my first "didn't remember I had that" treasure.  A pretty set of antique silver in a silverware chest that I'd thought was empty.  I'm guessing they have been in that box for 10 years.  It was a set of my grandmothers that my mother gave me when I came to help her purge her own home....she died a few short months later.

Since making the decision that this will be our forever home, I've got lots of things I want to do.  Not many are very big but would make a big impact.  As I drive past "for sale" signs on some of my favorite roads, that familiar thought to look up the property when I get home hits....but it's followed with a "why?"  I have had to remind myself I'm not going to move.  Then I laugh. 


"Temporary" seems to be the way people live now.  We live in homes "for now" until we find one that is bigger and "better".  We purchase things in disposable containers, we buy things because they are temporary and we won't have to do anything with them later.  Cars aren't driven until they die, only until the cool factor does.  Clothes are not worn until they are no longer useful but until they are out of style.  Everything is temporary.  Our appliances are built to be replaced, so are our cars and clothes, dishes and furniture.  The sole purpose of the things that are produced now is to fail after a short time so they can be purchased again.

It's disturbing.

I began to realize just how that had gotten into my head.  That I'd never thought of anywhere we'd lived....I'd lived....as a permanent residence.  It didn't occur to me that I wouldn't move again.  There were things I did and didn't do with our home because of that very fact.  There is resale to consider and why put in extra work on something if you won't be the benefactor?   I'm seeing it all very different now.  It feels different.  Maybe because this is my workplace and my home.  Perhaps it's a stage in life, a marker that each of us hits at some point and it isn't at all unique to my experience.

Whatever it is, I like it.  Home seems to have a bit of a different ring to it.

Blessings to you for new joy in the old stuff,
the Mrs.

It

a simple life

Things from generations before me have always drawn me to them like a magnet.   There is something comforting about them.   They carry with them the sentiments of a simpler time when things moved slower.  They drew you into relationship with others instead of distracting and drawing you out into the world. Manners were important, grace and appreciation were found in easy abundance.  Pride in ones work and respect for an other's wasn't hard to come by.  Doing something well, instead of fast, was not something to think twice about.

Mr teases my Donna Reed dream sometimes (though even she might be more modern than the lifestyle I'm drawn to).  Not with malice but with love.  I take it as a sign of success.  What I'm trying to accomplish in our home is working and it helps me to keep going.

A simple life.  One where convenience isn't a priority.  Food is made from scratch, things are used and taken care of so they can be reused instead of disposed of.  Home is a place where people matter more than the things, a bowl can be broken - forgiveness served with a smile - and help with the mess received.  A life where attitude and character count more than money or grades.   Effort is applauded in successes so the focus is on the person and not the object of accomplishment.

We live in a world where a fancy phone is so impressive people covet whatever the new model is but a beautiful sunset is shrugged off.   They are one of a kind, never repeated, never seen again.  I hope, with enough time, to teach my family that a spectacular sunset is worth stopping for.....worth attracting their attention.  Gadgets come and go but the deep and true things in life are what is worth paying attention to.  

This life of simplicity that I slowly try to weave into our normal existence goes so far beyond the antique "outdated" ways......it is the substance that flows underneath.  Quality over quantity not just with things but with relationships.   Building an atmosphere to nurture the spirit as well as the body....a place so stable and unwavering it embraces and accepts all who enter, touching them so deeply they are changed when they leave.   Home is so much more than a structure.   Home is a safe haven, a recharging station, a place where we grow, contemplate who we are, what we have learned and where we discover our innermost identity.

A home that is clean and tidy can be welcoming and inviting, to the mind as well as the body, but there is a line that can be crossed.  When the focus moves too intently on the things in the home or some image that must be portrayed.  When people feel they cannot sit anywhere or that they are too low to be in the space, that line has been crossed.  Making a home is an art, an act of love and learning that takes trying and failing.  You need to make a mess of some things before you can learn to make them truly beautiful.

Simplifying life leaves more room to experience it, to love those who are in it.  Our homes, like our souls, need to be purged now and again to get rid of the useless things we hang on to.   Clutter is so much more than visual chaos.   Often it represents something deeper.....things from our past that we've not addressed.  Hurt we cling to so we can use it as a weapon when we feel threatened.  Or a mark of having become complacent...too easily overlooking things that need attention......being blind to the obvious or simple laziness.

Personally I find that my home often represents where I am internally.   When my home is in chaos, often, so am I.  When our home is cluttered, so is my mind.  I think many people are that way, in that their space is reflective of where they are inside, but not everyone identifies the connection.  

I can identify several areas where I've been slipping in my home.  I struggle to maintain a schedule that I know keeps me efficient.   It's a process after all.   Not a perfect one and it doesn't look or feel the same for any two people but we must make the effort.  It is worth the effort.   They are worth the effort.

The wise woman builds her house but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.

Prov. 14:1

Blessings to you for all the richness of a simple, un-distracted life.

the Mrs.

Productivity is up

I rather impressed myself yesterday.   Not only did I catch up on things but I managed to make decent headway on my regular monday list.   It was a long work day - which was needed - but it really felt good to be back on track even with spending a regular hour on the phone with dad as well as having a visitor for just over an hour.

I only managed to get on the treadmill for one episode (currently working my way through Battlestar Galactica, which we've already watched but offers an extensive list of episodes to work through).  Shoveling didn't get accomplished but inside duties were well taken care of.

Maybe I'll finally get into that productive groove again.   This is a good start at least!

I thought I'd share something that I have found to be really helpful.   I've mentioned green tea many times.  It is SO good for you and is excellent for both energy and weight loss.  BUT all of these things are greatly enhanced when 1) you brew it correctly and 2) you use loose leaf tea.   Bags of tea are convenient yes, but they are also more expensive (you are paying for the packaging) and low quality because you are just getting the dust and leftovers from the good stuff.   Loose leaf tea can be brewed multiple times, 2 ounces can be as little as four dollars and change which is 25 cups of tea.......BUT with multiple steepings could offer you as many as 50 or more!  You don't get that from a box!  Here's where I order mine: Teasource they have excellent information on their website too.

Getting to my point....great intentions to drink more green tea do not always result in the actual drinking of more green tea!  The time it takes to stop and steep (for no longer than 3 minutes with hot but not boiling water) causes distraction for me because I must actually stop.   I have over steeped tea SO often....yes even with a tea timer....then I've needed to toss it because over steeping turns it bitter.  Finally, I've found a way to get my green tea in that takes no time at all!

oh how I love a mason jar.   This is a quart mason jar, it holds 4 cups.  I fill up my tea strainer ( I love the fine mesh ones because you don't get any of the tiny bits escaping into your tea) with a blend of a few different green teas I have.  The largest portion is of Moroccan Mint - a lovely blend of green tea and spearmint - and I steep it a little longer just because of the quantity - 4 minutes usually - add sweetener while it's still hot if you like and then store it in the fridge.  Then you have quick iced green tea right at your fingertips! 

That has hugely helped me to get in more tea.  Granted I also take a green tea supplement because its way easier but there is something more to steeped tea.  The energy boost comes within minutes and all of a sudden I am filled with the urge to move and get things done.  I am always more productive when I get my tea in.

Today is grocery day so I'm off to run in the cold and snow.  Maybe I'll actually get that shoveling done!  ....Maybe..... lol

Blessings to you today in all that you do, may you choose to be joyful in every task doing it all for His glory!

the Mrs.

Contentment in chaos...comes with the simplest choice

Its snowing.  FINALLY.  Perhaps it wont be the great blizzard I hope for but it's been snowing steadily for several hours and that gives me joy.   There is something peaceful about it......the steady, quiet, falling of those flakes is soothing when I am restless. 

My mind is on so many different things.  IEP meetings at school and how much I greatly dislike them...how small and completely insufficient I feel when I am there.  The mystery symptoms of my Dude that have had him feeling crummy more often than well.   By God's grace we got into the allergist last night to try and find some help for him.  It seemed that all the staff thought humor would put him at ease and cracked jokes instead of explaining the what and why of their actions, tools and procedures....he needed that information more than their humor.   His tears of discomfort and lack of understanding put them off guard.  I understood it but had a moment where I wished his tears didn't come so easily.....and then felt badly that the thought came at all.  I've been defending his ability to show emotion without shame for as long as I can remember....and here it was me who felt that twinge because it was clear that at near 11 they expected him to be tougher...and it made me insecure for the moment.  

We left without much answer to why or what has been causing the issues.  I clung to the blessing of knowing that "no, it's not his sinuses" is still an answer.  Check that off the list of possibilities and narrow the field.  Next check, vision screening and wait for blood work.

I  find myself remembering when I was a kid, always sick...always.  My mother fought for me, always.  Mystery illness was no stranger to she and I.  Seems our bodies always liked to off the beaten path when something was to go wrong or a side effect to occur.  It had to be the rare one....the thing that they wouldn't look for first or even second, third or seventh.  I find myself wondering what I'm missing, wondering what she would suggest to do or where to go.   Is it simple?  Is it something I had and I'm not remembering?

Lists, papers and books surround me right now.  

What a mess surrounding that lovely mug of iced coffee.  I love that little thrift store find!

As I glanced through my blog roll this morning I stopped in to see what Rhonda at Down To Earth would offer for weekend reading (she already well into her beautiful Aussie weekend I'm sure).  Found some good reading and a beautiful nugget to view on a wonderful couple who have created a beautiful self-sustained life on their property.   There was a moment where he briefly showed a spot on a wall with an old poster that read: "Happiness is found along the way, not at the end of the road".  He said it changed his way of thinking.  

It made me smile.  It made my heart a bit lighter.  Reminded me that in each moment there is joy because He is near me.  I made that mug of iced coffee....probably taking more points than I should out of my 26 but this momma has so many goals set.....so many puzzles to figure out that are not the picture kind, so many desires to do and be more....hopes for our home, family....myself.   I gave myself permission to take the time (and points) to offer myself a treat and allow Him to calm the chaos as I ponder it out...He never fails to point out the obvious this way with me.  Never fails.

Today, I reminded myself of my priorities.  God, family (husband first, children second), home, self, everything else falls somewhere after that.  The request for a visit this morning was turned down with apologies.  No, today I need to restore our home.  Restore peace for myself in the midst of chaos so that I can be fully present, fully available, fully attentive to my family.   In the process I hope to work side by side with Him to guide my hands and my heart to create a place where He can take center stage and conduct the chaos into order so that I do not allow the minor distractions and to-do's to pull my mind away from Him.

At times in my life I have envied those who fall so easily into "quiet time" with Him.  It has never come easily for me, anything resembling "ritual" has always left an unpleasant taste for me.  My heart has always longed for any "quiet time" be no different from any other time of day.  Remember I said that I wanted to reread Practicing His Presence in the pick up line?  A passage I read the other day so beautifully stated how I feel, what I desire to strive for and affirmed my heart....

"I have never been able to regulate my devotion by certain methods, as some do.   All bodily mortification and other exercises are useless except as they serve to arrive at union with God by love.  I have well considered this and found that the shortest way to God is to go straight to Him by a continual exercise of love and doing all things for His sake."  ~Brother Lawrence  

Please don't misunderstand, I have enormous respect for those who are able to love this discipline.  I do not condemn it or think anything wrong of it. How could I?  Jesus Himself took time to go away and be quiet and alone.  There in-lies part of the struggle.  I know the good possibilities but for me it has been a struggle of obligation, of trying to check a box that somehow marks me as a "good Christian".  Success has come for a short time and then faded as the routine blended into something on a to-do list and led to my heart feeling guilty that I was not coming to Him out of love.  Never has it brought me the same level intimacy with Him that comes from discussing my heart, my life or someone elses while folding laundry, cleaning or going about my regular business.  

It never fails to amuse me how people talk of needing to come to Him or ask Him to join them.  Does God ever leave the room?  Does He ever wander off?  No.  If He is Omnipresent then even when we find ourselves wandering off track and into the brambles in the darkness....we only need to turn around because He is there.  Light and love, hand outstretched to lead us back to the straight and narrow.  Ah, but we smart beings need to make things more complicated than they really are.   We need to "search for Him".   Goodness....He said He would never leave us nor forsake us. (Paul quotes this in Hebrews 13:5, the Lord's words to Joshua in Joshua 1:5)   At the same point, I often let the enemy get the better of my logic and think that I will only achieve that intimacy by some process of discipline.   No, silly woman just turn around.  

The only "process" is the simplicity of choice in the moment.  He is always there, closer than the air I breathe...I merely have to acknowledge Him and intimacy begins.

Blessings of turning moments that bring forth His loving intimacy that both takes your breath away and puts His breath into your very bones, 

the Mrs.

hidden in the secret spaces.....blessings richer than gold

I love words.  They get under my skin and into my head...changing my spirit, my attitude...my words.


In my home there are words everywhere.  Some are visible, some are hidden.  Some are quotes, many are scripture.  Some words motivate and encourage, other words guard or bless.

As a manager or "keeper" of the home my work is more than keeping a clean home and caring for the day to day activities, schedules and meals.   Beyond the work of managing, I am also monitoring the heart of our home.   Some say that the wife is the heart of the home and is some ways I suppose that may be true...but I think it would be more accurate to say that I set the stage and create the environment for the heart of our home.  As wives and mothers the environment we create may be one of the most important aspects of our work.

"If momma ain't happy, ain't no one happy".....I've always hated this phrase.  To me it has always evoked thoughts of a cranky, controlling woman who has to have it her way or the highway.  Yuck.  The fact is though, you can replace "momma" with any member of the family and the statement is just as true.  The effect that a negative attitude has on the people around it is powerful.  Have you ever noticed how even one sour person in a room of 10 or more can bring the whole room down?   The atmosphere we create in our homes can either encourage or dissipate negativity.   We send our family members out in the morning and over the course of the day they encounter many people and situations.  When they come back home they can still be carrying that with them and bringing it right into the house.   If your husband is in a particularly stressful season at work, the stress he brings home can be transferred to everyone in the house.  If the perspective of Dad's home coming is "watch out, dad is going to be cranky" the tension will mount and when Dad comes home...his  stress is then encouraged to stay, fed by the tension and apprehension in the home.   But if the perspective of the home was "Dad has had a tough day today so lets try to encourage him when he gets here", his stress is melted away and doesn't have a fighting chance of sticking around.  The home is a secure, united, sanctuary where all are refilled and refreshed to go back out into the world when it is time.

One of the ways that I nurture our environment is through prayer and scripture in our home.  Most of the artwork on our walls includes words or scripture.  The unseen is what has the most powerful affect though.

Years ago, when I was on my very first prayer team, I was introduced to prayer walking.  The team would meet before, during and after a class at church.  We prayed with the leaders, we prayed for the participants and while they gathered for dinner we prayed in the room where they would worship and listen to the nights speaker.  While they listened to the speaker, we were in the rooms where they would soon meet in groups to discuss the evening topic.

We prayed for them as individuals and as groups.  We prayed for the environment - that there would be grace and safety to be vulnerable, we prayed for their faith, their protection, for the work the Lord was doing in their hearts, for their conversations and for their leaders and families and the people they would encounter during the week before they came back for the next class.   In some rooms we even prayed away the burdens that may have been left there from previous groups - grief and divorce care groups that met there earlier in the week.  We covered a range of prayer and concerns I'd never have conceived of before.   What I learned there, I eventually started to apply to my own home.

In my kitchen I would pray for our nourishment - that our food would be protected and that He would guide me to making healthy choices and meals for our family, but also that they would be financially smart choices for our budget.  I didn't limit it to the food we ate....I would pray about His nourishing our family relationships, blessing the conversations and interactions that happened there.   I asked that He would use meal times to feed our family spiritual nutrients as well as physical and relational nutrients.

As I folded laundry I would pray for the person I was folding for.  When I made a bed I prayed for their rest and refreshment, their dreams, comfort and security.  In the main gathering rooms I prayed over the relationships and the conversations that happened there.   The social gatherings of friends and family...the conflicts between kids and tensions between spouses, the opportunities for ministry and joy and laughter.

Friends, I saw change.  The Lord bends down to listen, He hears our prayers. (Ps. 116:1-2)  I saw change in my family and I felt change in me.  I saw arguing diminish and conversation replace it.  I felt peace in the absence of tension.  And people notice....  They can't put their finger on it, they can't identify what it is but they comment.   "Your home feels so good."  "Its soft here."  "I love coming here, it's like a vacation." "I feel so at home, so welcome."


This is the work of the Lord.  Flawed as I am I am not capable of creating that.  Obedience to His prompting always results in great blessing.

What words hide in the secret places of our home?  In the four corners of our property there are either rocks with scripture on them or a steak driven into the earth.

I am the door. If anyone enters by Me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture.

John 10:9

The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand.  The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.  The Lord will keep you from all evil; He will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore.

Psalm 121:5-8

He will love you, bless you and multiply you.  He will also bless the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground, your grain and your wine and your oil, the increase of your herds and the young of your flock, in the land that He swore to your fathers to give you.

Deut. 7:13

The main entrance to our home is our kitchen door....here people enter into blessing.

Blessed you shall be when you com in and blessed you shall be when you go out.

Deut. 28:6

Because you have made the Lord your dwelling place - the Most High, who is my refuge - no evil shall be allowed to befall you, no plague come near your tent.

Psalm 91:9-10

Whether words are spoken at our kitchen table or not....blessing is present...

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be satisfied.

Matt. 5:6

Our living room hides teaching and encouragement...

On the contrary, the members of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and those members of the body that we think less honorable we clothe with  greater honor and our less respectable members are treated with greater respect; whereas our more respectable members do not need this.  But God has so arranged the body, giving the greater honor to the inferior member that there maybe no dissension within the body, but the members may have the same care for one another.  If one member suffers, all suffer together with it, if one member is honored all rejoice together in it.

Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.

1 Cor. 12:22-27

Therefore encourage one another and build up each other, as indeed you are doing.

1 Thess. 5:11

All over the house there are scriptures......the laundry room is not so subtle.  On the main wall (painted red by previous owners) the first thing you see when you enter the room is Proverbs 31:10-31 in white, hand written in paint pen from one end to the other.  On the cupboards printed out verses are taped that speak of controlling the tongue and what a wife should be.  The freezer speaks of managing harvest well, the ceiling speaks of where a husband who has a nagging wife is better off...

A good deep clean of a house, goes so much further than the corners and the nooks and crannies that only we can see.........a true deep cleaning goes to the depths of the heart and then pours out the mouth, laying every negative at the feet of Jesus and leaving behind only the fruit of His spirit....love for those we encounter.   For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Matt 12:34b  It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth that defiles.  Matt. 15:10-11

My kitchen window bears the lessons that need to change my heart or the focus my mind lacks.  It changes as  He prompts.  A black permanent marker to write and a green scrubby to remove. So when I wash dishes I don't just see the yard but His Word.  Bathroom mirrors often have a scripture or message on them....where ever the eye naturally rests....where we spend the most time standing still.....it sinks in.  It encourages.  It transforms.

The Word is powerful.  For the Word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and spirit, joints and marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.  Hebrews 4:12

Blessings for a clean heart, transformed mind and an unbridled passion for Him, 

the Mrs.

and I was doing so well....

...okay so I just missed yesterday....it is Wednesday right?

wow....it feels like a lot longer has gone by since Monday.

Today my son his home sick from school.   Nothing big but when I ask the question "do you think you can make it through a whole day at school?"  and his answer is "no".  I know he really isn't feeling well.   He is the most honest straight forward kid I have ever met.  If he didn't want to go to school, he'd say "I don't want to go but I am not sick enough to stay home, I can go."  Not kidding.   This boy epitomizes "rule follower".....to the letter.   I love it and him.  It can be amazing, frustrating, inspiring and hysterical to have such and honest and literal child.....I wonder if this is what I was like as a kid?

Anyway.....I have gotten my workout in for the day and even made a trip to Goodwill to search for "sock hop" clothes for Mr.  I think I may have found something but not entirely sure.   I did however find a few tops for myself while I was there.   It is the coolest feeling to go through a random rack of clothes and know that SOMETHING will fit and flatter!  It's not such a huge search anymore!   I can shop pretty much anywhere right now.   No need for a special "plus size" store or section anymore!

Currently I'm able to wear a top in a size Large - sometimes a Medium! (that's down from a pre-weight watchers size 14/16)  I don't know numbers yet tho...   Jeans or pants....I'm not entirely sure yet.   I have one pair of jeans that actually fit and look nice on, they are a size 15 from the Jr's department (which is down from a 16/18 in the plus size stores).  

I am short and carry all my weight in the middle on top of chicken legs - picture a tomato on toothpicks.

The waist area is taking its sweet time in melting but there are beginning to be signs that there really is a rib cage under there!   I still have no waist or hips to speak of....really more of a block.  BUT that will change in time! :)

So there's my check in for the day.  I'm struggling to stay on track and get things done in a timely manner but working out is throwing things off.  Mr told me in no uncertain terms that I am not to put housework before working out.  My priority is supposed to be me and whatever I need to do to keep going and he will help with whatever doesn't get done.  Isn't he sweet!

Time to hit the showers and get ready for him to come home with Wonder Teen.  It's our weekly Wednesday night visit before she goes to church.

Blessings,
the Mrs.

So much for consistency!

Okay....so I said I'd be writing more about life in general and not limit myself huh....so why haven't I been on?

I am still not in the swing of the season. Strangely it's taking longer than usual BUT I have pulled out my schedules again and am going to get back on track.  I have seen so many people have routines in their Homemaking binders, or whatever you may call yours, and they all vary so much.   I came to the conclusion that a rotation worked best for me.  So I work with four sheets, one for each week of the month and I have four sets - one for each season.  Because lets face it, I'm not gardening in February when there is 5 feet of snow outside.
I also got myself a day planner....hmm....maybe I mentioned that already...anyhoo...so far I feel like it's helping.  As the kids get older and with my Mr's work stuff I need to keep things organized or something will fall straight off the radar!

Here's my schedule and day planner.  I have a copy of my schedule in my binder (of which I now have two! - one for home and one for family) but the ones I use are in plastic sleeves and held together by a metal ring.  That way I can move them easily from place to place without messing with my binder but still keep track of what I need to be doing.

I am in an epic fail cycle with weight watchers.   Before school started I took a break from counting and managed to hold still for nearly a month....then....September hit and I just seemed unable to get back on track and I couldn't figure it out.  Now we are in October and I have regained about 5lbs - 5! It may not seem like much but considering where the weight goes and my 5'3 frame - they are visible.  TOTALLY visible and they mock me.  Lame.   SO, I had some sort of light bulb moment and realized that my fairly extensive vitamin regimen was off.  I hadn't taken vit C in weeks and a couple of other things were out.....so I wondered....and then I read some random link between hunger and vitamin C levels and figured, what the heck! SO I reordered and restocked - and guess what just came to the door!

Yup those are all mine.

I've never been so excited to pop pills. :)  Hopefully I can get my body back to feeling normal - for me - and crack the whip on points and getting activity in daily.  Something has got to give!  

On other notes - today is the 13th anniversary of the day I married my Mr.  All those years ago people didn't think we'd make it.  It was silly for us young 21 and 22 year olds with a little one to think we could be grown ups.  But we did it. Today I am so proud of our story.   I am so thrilled and blessed to have had a front row seat to watch what the Lord was going to do in our lives, how He was going to grow my Mr into such an amazing (not to mention smokin hot) man of God.  Our anniversary is so cool because it's also the anniversary of us becoming a family.  I got a package deal - wife and mother in one swoop!  She's gone from my punkin head to my wonder teen - she went to homecoming last weekend!  Craziness. 

Happy anniversary to the most amazing man I know.  I could not have dreamed up a man as wonderful as God has made you.  I am blessed to be your wife and with each year I fall more deeply head over heels for you.  I love you so much!

I'll be back......hopefully sooner than later.... :)

Blessings, 

the Mrs.

The ministry in the mundane....

I love what I do.  I cannot imagine what else I would do with my life if I wasn't a homemaker full time.  I highly doubt I'd be a very good employee.....my mind certainly wouldn't be on what I was supposed to be doing.

I did not always love what I do.  In the beginning I didn't understand anything deeper than the practical tasks that needed to be done.  At first it was simply the best option for a one car family and no college education.  I couldn't have made any more than daycare would have cost so, what was the point?   It didn't occur to me what my job really was...beyond the obvious cooking, cleaning, laundry and making sure kids were taken care of.  I did not cheerfully keep house, in fact I'm fairly certain that I grumbled my way through.   I was resentful if I had to turn socks right side out or take care of something that someone was certainly more than capable of doing themselves.

I had attitude.  I believed that I was above some things and that "maid was not written on my forehead"......{yes, I actually used that phrase...oy.}.....Humble.....not so much my strong suit.   I was a believer at the time, in thought but not in deed.  Ah, I think perhaps that there was some maturity lacking.....gee, ya think?   Selfless was really not something I understood but if you'd asked me at the time....I probably thought I was Oh SO selfless.

I look back and grieve how often my husband would ask for help in the areas that he knows are not his strength and I blatantly turned him down out of my own arrogance.    So many times he made one simple request....help him by putting together a lunch for him to bring to work.   In my head I only heard my voice yelling about how I had no reason to wake up early and how selfish for him to ask me to give up that sleep, he was perfectly capable of doing it himself...if he weren't so lazy....if....   Unfortunately those things didn't just stay in my head.....and they drowned out Mr's request....not just the words but the struggle behind them....he was tired, it was hard enough to get up in the morning let alone earlier so he could put a lunch together......he wanted to save the money it cost him to purchase a lunch....


Had I been in the Word at that time....I would have learned from Proverbs...

When there are many words, sin is unavoidable, 

but the one who controls his lips is wise.  ~10:19

There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, 

but the tongue of the wise brings healing.   ~12:18

The one who gives an answer before he listens 

- this is foolishness and disgrace for him.  ~18:13

 Conviction.   Ouch...but the Lord started to gradually change my heart many years ago.  The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie O'Martin.   This book changed our lives.  Yes, both mine and Mr's.  My favorite sentence in the whole book is one line out of a prayer....it was the hardest line to pray and it became my favorite prayer:  "Lord, Give my husband a new wife....and let it be me."

The Lord does amazing things through prayer.   Slowly He changed my heart, softened it and made me realize how selfish I'd been.   Gradually my prayer life began to take off.   I began to realize that I didn't have to just pray to God while I was sitting with my hands neatly folded.....I could talk to Him while I folded clothes instead.  I could talk to Him while I did dishes....scrubbed toilets.....floors.....made the bed...    The fly on the wall probably thought that I'd totally lost my marbles....because I wandered around talking to God, out loud.  Oh how He softened me....He turned my mundane tasks into a ministry.   Everything was done while talking to Him.....and everything became more joyful.   I no longer resented the socks rolled in a ball I needed to undo.....{don't get me wrong, it is not my favorite....nor do I jump with glee to pick up undies from the floor}......I learned how to do my job with Joy.   It was amazing to discover what the Joy of the Lord meant.

Gradually I started to do more, I got better at my work and became a much better housekeeper.  Eventually I even worked into my morning routine.....{are you ready?}.....getting up with him to make his breakfast and pack a lunch for him while he showered and gets ready for work.   Still do.  But I do it gladly now....it may seem small and mundane but I know how much it means to him.....this is part of my life's ministry. 

The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain.

She does him good not harm all the days of her life.  

~Prov. 31:11-12

Blessings to you, 

the Mrs.

Lemon Fresh

I do my best to keep cleaning costs to a minimum.  He works hard to earn an income to provide for us and a large part of my job is to keep the outgoing costs to a minimum.   After all, someday I hope for us both to be home and enjoying our old age together. :) 

One of the big things that I've learned about is home cleaners.  When I grew up I thought that everything must be purchased and in order for it to be really, truly clean you must use lots and lots of stinky ~make your lungs squeeze~ cleaners.   Brilliant, huh?

So when I learned that all I really needed to keep my home clean was vinegar, water, baking soda and soap...I about dropped over.   Only problem is that my handsome hubster HATES the smell of vinegar.  I don't blame him...it is not the most appetizing smell to hit you when you enter the kitchen.  So I've added essential oils or substituted rubbing alcohol or peroxide for random things.   You'd be amazed at what a little bit of liquid vegetable oil soap mixed with tea tree oil and water will do for your counters....and the smell?  Divine! 

Anyhooo....so I read somewhere....and now I honestly can't remember where (would love to give them credit)......that if you put lemon peel into vinegar it will change it to lemon scented vinegar.  No way! Yes, way.   I tried it.  I have now had strips of lemon peel (cut very shallow to avoid the white as much as possible) at the bottom of a small bottle of vinegar.

 It worked!   It actually smells like lemon instead of vinegar!  I am excited to make up some new cleaners that smell lemony fresh for spring!

My Mr has been secretly saving his pocket money.   We budget very carefully and each of us gets a certain amount of money to spend on what we want.  He had been socking some of his away and saving it to buy me something.    He waited patiently for a particular sale and when it hit, he came home with this:

It is a battery powered hand tiller for the garden!   The sale included an extra battery for free. :)  I've had some issues physically in the last few years and I don't have the hand/arm strength I used to....or should for my age.  So this will do wonders!    Mr has been great to help me in the garden when I ask {even if gardening isn't exactly the love of his life} but this will give me some independence in that area so I don't have to wait for the muscles to come and help before I can move forward on gardening projects.

He is the best!  {Love you!}

The sun is shining here and the rains at night have been washing away the snow and dirt.  I walked around the garden today, first time this year, and actually saw a few green sprouts! :)  

Blessings on your day!
the Mrs.