The purging process is interesting. Much more so this time than the last.
There is a different thought process this time. One that has surprised me. Detaching emotions from things. This has been a hard one for me in the past. Things tend to help trigger memories for me that might otherwise be lost. Perhaps this marks a growth point....finally accepting that my brain injury will simply mean that some moments aren't meant to last for me but a memory meant for someone else to hold. There is a freedom in simply being in the moment and not desperately trying to create something that will last. There is something beautiful about not trying to secretly put the pieces together in my head, pretending to remember what someone is talking about and instead....simply asking them help me remember.
The first wave of the purge resulted in filling the back of my husbands car. Books, movies, dishes, clothes and perhaps the item that surprised the most people....my wedding dress. Yep. It's gone. My daughter stripped off a piece of the lace from the waist and that was all she wanted to keep.
How did I do it? I started asking why. I asked what the real value was....but NOT the monetary value of the item. The REAL value, to me, is in the space. The real reason I'm getting rid of things. To be free of them, to claim space and peace and less to take care of. To free my mind of the mental clutter objects hold.
So when I went through the sheets I kept only two summer sets and two winter sets for each bed. No more. I went through towels and got rid of over 50% of them after finding that I had two stacks that had not been touched in over 2 years. We now have roughly 8 bath towels for our family of four. I've now moved several old towels into the laundry area to be re-purposed for rags and dog baths. I replaced several washcloths that had gotten old and yucky with some that were on sale for $4 for a stack of 4 and purchased 2 new bath towels to round out the number of towels kept to be of equal quality.
I've cleaned out under our bed and gotten rid of a number of things that hadn't seen the light of day in 9 years. Our unity candle set and stand being one of those items. I found old post cards I'd kept from my grandmothers things, I originally kept them thinking one day I'd make something neat with them or they "might be worth something". That is one of those tricks of the mind that gets us to keep junk. Who defines worth? I'd invited friends to come and look through the heaps of things I'd purged to see if anyone found anything to be of use to them. The result was humorous. They all mentioned that they had caught the purge bug too and didn't want to bring more things into their homes. Then, one sweet friend started in on "but you can't get rid of this! It's probably worth something!" Right then and there I felt that tug the world has and as I felt it I laughed. Here I wasn't being chided about how I was donating an expensive wedding dress to goodwill but that I was getting rid of those old postcards. "Sell them on Ebay! Bring them into an antique store!" That's not worth my time. Suddenly I began to feel very clear about what I considered valuable and what has worth to me. This wasn't it. Spending time to research or bring them somewhere had no value or worth to me, it would defeat the purpose of what I was doing. The value was in them not being in my home. Not being in my space. Not being in my home, my mind, or my control.
The value was in cutting the tie.
I'm not sure if I'm talking about this purging process more than I feel like I am or what is happening but there are several people in my life making comments that what I'm doing is spreading. They are initiating conversations with me about getting rid of things, paring down their belongings and then telling me that it is spreading out to other people they know. Comments about my strength in emotionally detaching from things and being able to get rid of things that have sentimental value. ....that one puzzles me.....I'm not sure if it's my perspective that is off, or theirs. Most of the time the object doesn't have sentimental "value" but guilt attached. I think I'm starting to sort out what that is for me. The difference between keeping something I love because it has a pleasant memory and keeping something because whats attached is "how could you get rid of that? It was _____'s!" The fact that something is silver, gold, crystal or was previously owned by someone is of no consequence to me. An object is only as valuable as the level of enjoyment I have in it. That is it. I no longer want to keep things because someone gave them to me and might be offended if I don't keep it. If that's why something is on a shelf then the only thing on display is guilt, not beauty and certainly not enjoyment.
The first load of purged items are now gone. I've taken a few weeks to enjoy the last bits of summer, a week away with family, allowing my body to rest after another bout of pain and reflecting on where I am with Him.....where we are together and what He is teaching me in this process.
School starts next week and I'm looking forward to the structure that provides to the day. The time and solitude it lends. I'm excited to get back into purging more of the house as well....maybe even more, what I will learn in the process.
Blessings,
the Mrs.
Showing posts with label this simple life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label this simple life. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Finding the basics
Finding contentment.
It comes in stages. A step here, a mistep there. Learning that even when we are retracing our steps we are still moving forward, not back.
Understanding that contentment comes from being in the moment instead of anticipating the one to come.
The Lord was good to tell me to Be Buoyant this year. The waves have carried battle after battle during the first half of the year. Currently it seems as if there has been a dramatic shift. The waves have been silenced and I find myself looking out on waters still as glass. Gently shifting to look in all directions and in awe of the clarity that is left in the absence of waves.
What I observe is how I drifted from a particular way of living and thinking. I find myself among varying levels of clutter. Too many things had found their way in to the home. Too many distractions had found their way into my time and my mind.....occupying way too much space.
Again I find myself purging our home of all manner of useless things. Things I thought had some sentimental value but really just sat hidden in a cabinet. Did I think I would be thought heartless to discard something simply because it belonged to someone? Did I think that somehow a piece of them would live through my ownership of an item that had no other use?
There was a time when "things" were only as good as their practical use and service. I lost that somewhere along the line. Time to find it and look at things differently. It is so much easier to let go of things when you can see them simply for their usefulness. The openness in cabinets, closets and under beds is freeing. Soon our home will be pared back down to the basic necessities. The children will make their own choices in their rooms but for the rest of the house...back to basics. No more holding on to materials from the 70's simply because I have fond memories of my mother connected to them. Frankly they are hysterically hideous and I'd never make anything from them. So why do I keep them? Some lie that I'd somehow be tossing my mother aside by no longer owning them? It's silly really but grief is an odd creature full of strange habits and ways of thinking.
Time to be done and rid of the ridiculous. Some call it Minimalism or Simple Living....I guess I don't care what it's called, I just want what I know it comes with. Freedom. Time. Space. Gratitude. Clarity. Joy. Availability. Authenticity.
When stuff clutters my home it clutters my mind as well. I've known this always but here I am realizing all the sneaky buggers that have crawled into my life, mind and space.
The biggest revelation I've had has been the hardest one to come to a conclusion on how to handle. I can easily toss 'things' in the garbage, this is not the issue.....it's the digital clutter I've become aware of.
I've spent the last two days home alone, for the first time in perhaps a decade. The Lord, I feel, has been easing me into this place. The last few weeks have been absurdly peaceful, quiet and simple. Stillness has been a big part. Stopping to just listen, evaluate life, why I do what I do, how I do what I do, what I want life to be and feel but also the pace at which I not only want to live but the pace at which I need to live. A pace that allows the freedom to be available to others but also feeds my spirit, rests my mind and body and allows me to function at my personal best. A pace that allows me to recognize when I am speeding up or drifting off course to please someone else's expectations. To recognize when that same pleasing pulls me in a direction that is not authentically me. When joining the masses of what is cool, normal and trendy tap the temple with temptation and suddenly you find yourself surrounded by things and quite discontent. So where did that come from? When did it start and how do I shut it off?
Suddenly I found myself staring quite clearly at the difference between now and then. The birth of a digital life. That little yellow house had never met Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Pinterest. They had not been born yet. There was email and land lines. We had no cell phones. The highest percentage of my day was spent in silence with only the noises of children and perhaps the soft sounds of the local christian radio station coming from the kitchen. There were no iPods or MP3 players. We kept in touch with real people in our lives.....not people we used to know, people we don't see face to face. Effort was placed on relationships in the here and now. Cards, letters, emails, phone calls....not tweets and posts to boast of our latest meal or random tiny endeavor for the day. Is opening or closing the windows really newsworthy?
Suddenly it all seemed a crazy ridiculous lump of clutter. It was visual, tactile and mental. Suddenly I wanted to delete it all. Then I realized that it had actually become impractical to do that. There had been wonderful things that had come out of digital interactions. Relationships that benefited and grew through that digital media. It wasn't all bad. So how to move forward from here.....
I decided I needed to approach this purge a bit more slowly. First I recognized that this was a legitimate habit that needed to be broken and it shouldn't be simply cut off cold turkey because it involves more than just me. My first step was to go through facebook and unfollow pages and some people. Break it down to the first level of basics. I did the same on the other sites too. Next I turned off all notifications that didn't involve direct contact. That means Facebook, Twitter and Instagram - notifications were shut off. iMessage, Messenger, Voxer and Email were left on - these are digital connections like a phone call, they must be done with personal, direct and intentional action on the part of the sender, so it stays. Next I moved Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest into a file on my iPod touch (I do not have a cellphone) titled: Digital distractions and placed it on the second screen. Therefore it takes at least two intentional actions to access them as well as seeing the words Digital Distraction to remind me.
The benefits are already being felt. I'm also seeing posts in a new way. Sadly I'm seeing so much less real stuff than just junk....complaining, attention seeking....general negativity. Suddenly I'm very aware that I want to go back to a time when everyone's life wasn't in my face so much. Its funny how you can get so sucked in to something and not see it for what it really is. How we can become so engaged in something in an oblivious way. I confess I've been a Facebook addict. I've refreshed my screen I don't know how many times just waiting for then next interesting tidbit to scroll on by. Perhaps its the voyeurism of glimpsing in a window to see how someone really lives, looking through photo albums of a stranger until you've seen so many snapshots you feel like you "really know them". We don't of course because we edit ourselves and post in a way that makes us appear one way or another.
Now I seek to find my balance between a full digital exit and just enough to stay conveniently connected with those who I want to stay connected with. I have a feeling there will be more editing to come...there has certainly been a lot of "hiding" individuals. I've made no grand announcements and probably won't...seems silly to announce to the world that you'll be voting them off the island. They probably wouldn't notice anyway.
Maybe I'll be back to update you.....or maybe......
Blessings from the digital detox trenches,
the Mrs.
It comes in stages. A step here, a mistep there. Learning that even when we are retracing our steps we are still moving forward, not back.
Understanding that contentment comes from being in the moment instead of anticipating the one to come.
The Lord was good to tell me to Be Buoyant this year. The waves have carried battle after battle during the first half of the year. Currently it seems as if there has been a dramatic shift. The waves have been silenced and I find myself looking out on waters still as glass. Gently shifting to look in all directions and in awe of the clarity that is left in the absence of waves.
What I observe is how I drifted from a particular way of living and thinking. I find myself among varying levels of clutter. Too many things had found their way in to the home. Too many distractions had found their way into my time and my mind.....occupying way too much space.
Again I find myself purging our home of all manner of useless things. Things I thought had some sentimental value but really just sat hidden in a cabinet. Did I think I would be thought heartless to discard something simply because it belonged to someone? Did I think that somehow a piece of them would live through my ownership of an item that had no other use?
There was a time when "things" were only as good as their practical use and service. I lost that somewhere along the line. Time to find it and look at things differently. It is so much easier to let go of things when you can see them simply for their usefulness. The openness in cabinets, closets and under beds is freeing. Soon our home will be pared back down to the basic necessities. The children will make their own choices in their rooms but for the rest of the house...back to basics. No more holding on to materials from the 70's simply because I have fond memories of my mother connected to them. Frankly they are hysterically hideous and I'd never make anything from them. So why do I keep them? Some lie that I'd somehow be tossing my mother aside by no longer owning them? It's silly really but grief is an odd creature full of strange habits and ways of thinking.
Time to be done and rid of the ridiculous. Some call it Minimalism or Simple Living....I guess I don't care what it's called, I just want what I know it comes with. Freedom. Time. Space. Gratitude. Clarity. Joy. Availability. Authenticity.
When stuff clutters my home it clutters my mind as well. I've known this always but here I am realizing all the sneaky buggers that have crawled into my life, mind and space.
The biggest revelation I've had has been the hardest one to come to a conclusion on how to handle. I can easily toss 'things' in the garbage, this is not the issue.....it's the digital clutter I've become aware of.
The irony of the fact that I am blogging about discovering digital clutter is not lost on me.
Every time I recall when I was at my mental best, my most productive, when I was most content and happy, when my relationship with the Lord was at it's most deep, clean, clear and in an intensely personal place....I go back to the little yellow house. Tiny and old with the barest of necessities and our finances were just as bare. I've wondered time and again what it was....the season in life?....the desperate times?.....the horrible, no good, frightening neighborhood? I've never really been able to put my finger on it....until the last two days.I've spent the last two days home alone, for the first time in perhaps a decade. The Lord, I feel, has been easing me into this place. The last few weeks have been absurdly peaceful, quiet and simple. Stillness has been a big part. Stopping to just listen, evaluate life, why I do what I do, how I do what I do, what I want life to be and feel but also the pace at which I not only want to live but the pace at which I need to live. A pace that allows the freedom to be available to others but also feeds my spirit, rests my mind and body and allows me to function at my personal best. A pace that allows me to recognize when I am speeding up or drifting off course to please someone else's expectations. To recognize when that same pleasing pulls me in a direction that is not authentically me. When joining the masses of what is cool, normal and trendy tap the temple with temptation and suddenly you find yourself surrounded by things and quite discontent. So where did that come from? When did it start and how do I shut it off?
Suddenly I found myself staring quite clearly at the difference between now and then. The birth of a digital life. That little yellow house had never met Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Pinterest. They had not been born yet. There was email and land lines. We had no cell phones. The highest percentage of my day was spent in silence with only the noises of children and perhaps the soft sounds of the local christian radio station coming from the kitchen. There were no iPods or MP3 players. We kept in touch with real people in our lives.....not people we used to know, people we don't see face to face. Effort was placed on relationships in the here and now. Cards, letters, emails, phone calls....not tweets and posts to boast of our latest meal or random tiny endeavor for the day. Is opening or closing the windows really newsworthy?
Suddenly it all seemed a crazy ridiculous lump of clutter. It was visual, tactile and mental. Suddenly I wanted to delete it all. Then I realized that it had actually become impractical to do that. There had been wonderful things that had come out of digital interactions. Relationships that benefited and grew through that digital media. It wasn't all bad. So how to move forward from here.....
I decided I needed to approach this purge a bit more slowly. First I recognized that this was a legitimate habit that needed to be broken and it shouldn't be simply cut off cold turkey because it involves more than just me. My first step was to go through facebook and unfollow pages and some people. Break it down to the first level of basics. I did the same on the other sites too. Next I turned off all notifications that didn't involve direct contact. That means Facebook, Twitter and Instagram - notifications were shut off. iMessage, Messenger, Voxer and Email were left on - these are digital connections like a phone call, they must be done with personal, direct and intentional action on the part of the sender, so it stays. Next I moved Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest into a file on my iPod touch (I do not have a cellphone) titled: Digital distractions and placed it on the second screen. Therefore it takes at least two intentional actions to access them as well as seeing the words Digital Distraction to remind me.
The benefits are already being felt. I'm also seeing posts in a new way. Sadly I'm seeing so much less real stuff than just junk....complaining, attention seeking....general negativity. Suddenly I'm very aware that I want to go back to a time when everyone's life wasn't in my face so much. Its funny how you can get so sucked in to something and not see it for what it really is. How we can become so engaged in something in an oblivious way. I confess I've been a Facebook addict. I've refreshed my screen I don't know how many times just waiting for then next interesting tidbit to scroll on by. Perhaps its the voyeurism of glimpsing in a window to see how someone really lives, looking through photo albums of a stranger until you've seen so many snapshots you feel like you "really know them". We don't of course because we edit ourselves and post in a way that makes us appear one way or another.
Now I seek to find my balance between a full digital exit and just enough to stay conveniently connected with those who I want to stay connected with. I have a feeling there will be more editing to come...there has certainly been a lot of "hiding" individuals. I've made no grand announcements and probably won't...seems silly to announce to the world that you'll be voting them off the island. They probably wouldn't notice anyway.
Maybe I'll be back to update you.....or maybe......
Blessings from the digital detox trenches,
the Mrs.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Challenge accepted.
Sometime early this year.....or perhaps late last year but at some point in the past I cannot exactly pinpoint...we gathered a few friends to a challenge. My Mr and a guy friend started to chat about beer and somehow ended up on cooking and the two fell together into a vote I wasn't there for.
We had our first Beer Dinner challenge - the Beta test. I know, the name is entirely too creative. Not entirely sure how well it would go, we moved forward and everyone was asked to come up with a dish, dessert or whatever they could think of, that they could infuse beer into. The Beta Test was a Surly challenge. It was all about one brand of beer and using any of the flavors they make. The results were outrageously, ridiculously amazing. People drooled and raved and broke out in the meat sweats and fell into swollen belly comas while laughing way too hard. A second event was demanded.
You're curious aren't you.....you want to know what on earth was so good we needed to do it a second time. Here's a list to the best of my memory: Bender beef stew, Coffee Bender chili (I think), beer bread, Chocolate cake with bender frosting, Coffee Bender Chocolate Cheesecake, Furious Glazed Salmon Puffs (Profiteroles were also made with Furious), Bender Bacon Mushroom Meatloaf (pretzels instead of bread crumbs), Coffee Bender marinated steaks rubbed with a coffee brown sugar dry rub, Abrasive Jello Jigglers, salad with....a dressing made with beer I can't remember and I know there's more I'm forgetting. But you get the point.
This weekend will be Beer Dinner 2.0. Any beer is fair game and the guest list doubled. The Mr and I get a tad carried away....our list has topped out at 8. So far I have Hell Fire Pickles and Furious Peanut Brittle. The Toffee kinda went all wrong so attempt #2 will be today along with the much demanded Bender Bacon meatloaf I made last year, the sober-Vegan Sloppy Joes and Amazeballs. I'll be in the kitchen if you need me....for the rest of the week. Tomorrow I clean the house, make the jigglers and any last minute cooking things I can think of. Then Saturday will be the Rogue Doughnut pork sliders, the 21+ Mac n Cheese and decorating the garage for the event.
Here's the funny part.....ya know all those food issues I have? I can't eat any of the food with beer in it. Thus...the "sober" vegan sloppy joes and Amazeballs. I'm actually thinking I'll be doing a gluten free Apple Slab pie too since one of our friends is gluten free and I'm not sure how much she will be able to eat either. So the challenge for me is to cook things I can't eat or taste and have them actually turn out not only edible but tasting of awesome.....because, lets face it, I do have a reputation to uphold.
On other challenge notes......what do you do when you don't really own table cloths (I know, I know, my membership to womanhood should be revoked, but I'm okay with that) but are trying to make a party in your garage not look like.....a party in your garage.... You opt for creative solutions. Knowing that this party will most likely become an annual event I made the executive decision that I need to get supplies that will be reused so I am not spending a fortune on disposable table stuff every year. I was on a mission to find some nice table cloths I could use over and over in fall-ish colors. Much to my dismay I found that all table cloths of any decent size were at least $16 and I need at least 3. Time to employ creativity. I found 3 clearance curtain panels in chocolate and eggplant for less than $10 a piece, a clearance set of napkins (to use under candle centerpieces) for $5, 3 different kitchen towels for $4 and a few candles from the dollar store will get things looking a bit nicer and smelling a bit less "garage". A bag of cranberries, some tea-light candles freed from there little metal containers, some raffia and mason jars will be the center pieces along with the tiny little pumpkins I got last week.
I will do my best to take pictures......but we know I suck at doing that.
I'm excited to see if we can pull this off......well.....okay I know we can easily pull it off but I'm actually excited to see if I can pull off making a garage look nice for a party and not have everyone freeze to death.
Challenge accepted.
Blessings of fall fun to each of you,
the Mrs.
We had our first Beer Dinner challenge - the Beta test. I know, the name is entirely too creative. Not entirely sure how well it would go, we moved forward and everyone was asked to come up with a dish, dessert or whatever they could think of, that they could infuse beer into. The Beta Test was a Surly challenge. It was all about one brand of beer and using any of the flavors they make. The results were outrageously, ridiculously amazing. People drooled and raved and broke out in the meat sweats and fell into swollen belly comas while laughing way too hard. A second event was demanded.
You're curious aren't you.....you want to know what on earth was so good we needed to do it a second time. Here's a list to the best of my memory: Bender beef stew, Coffee Bender chili (I think), beer bread, Chocolate cake with bender frosting, Coffee Bender Chocolate Cheesecake, Furious Glazed Salmon Puffs (Profiteroles were also made with Furious), Bender Bacon Mushroom Meatloaf (pretzels instead of bread crumbs), Coffee Bender marinated steaks rubbed with a coffee brown sugar dry rub, Abrasive Jello Jigglers, salad with....a dressing made with beer I can't remember and I know there's more I'm forgetting. But you get the point.
This weekend will be Beer Dinner 2.0. Any beer is fair game and the guest list doubled. The Mr and I get a tad carried away....our list has topped out at 8. So far I have Hell Fire Pickles and Furious Peanut Brittle. The Toffee kinda went all wrong so attempt #2 will be today along with the much demanded Bender Bacon meatloaf I made last year, the sober-Vegan Sloppy Joes and Amazeballs. I'll be in the kitchen if you need me....for the rest of the week. Tomorrow I clean the house, make the jigglers and any last minute cooking things I can think of. Then Saturday will be the Rogue Doughnut pork sliders, the 21+ Mac n Cheese and decorating the garage for the event.
Here's the funny part.....ya know all those food issues I have? I can't eat any of the food with beer in it. Thus...the "sober" vegan sloppy joes and Amazeballs. I'm actually thinking I'll be doing a gluten free Apple Slab pie too since one of our friends is gluten free and I'm not sure how much she will be able to eat either. So the challenge for me is to cook things I can't eat or taste and have them actually turn out not only edible but tasting of awesome.....because, lets face it, I do have a reputation to uphold.
On other challenge notes......what do you do when you don't really own table cloths (I know, I know, my membership to womanhood should be revoked, but I'm okay with that) but are trying to make a party in your garage not look like.....a party in your garage.... You opt for creative solutions. Knowing that this party will most likely become an annual event I made the executive decision that I need to get supplies that will be reused so I am not spending a fortune on disposable table stuff every year. I was on a mission to find some nice table cloths I could use over and over in fall-ish colors. Much to my dismay I found that all table cloths of any decent size were at least $16 and I need at least 3. Time to employ creativity. I found 3 clearance curtain panels in chocolate and eggplant for less than $10 a piece, a clearance set of napkins (to use under candle centerpieces) for $5, 3 different kitchen towels for $4 and a few candles from the dollar store will get things looking a bit nicer and smelling a bit less "garage". A bag of cranberries, some tea-light candles freed from there little metal containers, some raffia and mason jars will be the center pieces along with the tiny little pumpkins I got last week.
I will do my best to take pictures......but we know I suck at doing that.
I'm excited to see if we can pull this off......well.....okay I know we can easily pull it off but I'm actually excited to see if I can pull off making a garage look nice for a party and not have everyone freeze to death.
Challenge accepted.
Blessings of fall fun to each of you,
the Mrs.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Mark me tardy...
...or maybe absent is more like it. My mind has been focused on all the stations of transition in our lives right now. Lots of changes, some big and some small but all are important.
The biggest transition....the biggest change....is that my husband is changing careers. Not just his job. This has been a dream of his for nearly a decade. The Lord orchestrated this timing perfectly and all the doors were flung open for him and the support that rallied around him was so encouraging. This will be a very felt transition for the whole family. He won't be just changing buildings or offices. He will have 4 months of intense study and training - right here in our basement, taking all the classes and tests on-line through the company. It means creating a working, functioning office space for him. It means a diminished income (but we've been planning and saving for this possible opportunity for many years and have a plan), tightening the belts and making choices more thoughtfully. It means he will be home, the commute from home to work will be mere seconds. It means lunches and hugs and learning to respect each others work and work space while sharing it. It means new schedules and volume levels. It means a lot of unknowns and that our attitudes will need to be chosen wisely. It means a big huge transition for him physically and mentally.
The school year means transitioning from seeing our daughter frequently, to very little. Its hard. Hard to have to miss out on the little things we will never get to be part of. Morning routines and kitchen door send offs. It means more phone calls and facebooking. Catching up on the details of her life after the fact.
The school year also means our Dude is in the middle of his own big transition. It's waking up earlier, riding a bus, learning to navigate the hallways and get to classes on time. Dealing with stubborn lockers and learning to play an instrument. Making friends and finding his place. Starting a new youth program and meeting new leaders and students.
For me it means supporting all these people I love so much. It means being aware of where we all are, what the needs are of our family and making sure that the tone set in our home is one that gives them comfort. Making sure that home is a place where they can decompress, relax, refresh and restore from all that stuff that goes on in their day. A place where they can feel free to talk it all through and know that there is someone who is going to listen, help them find a solution or just simply understand the frustration. A place full of hugs and sometimes cookies but always a place where they feel safe to be who they are and have a voice to say what it is they are feeling.
Gosh, even the house itself has gone through some big changes. Dude's room was redecorated. Living room got new furniture and everything was moved around. All the furniture moving changed out a couple of pieces in the dining area. The basement has had a huge face lift just from trading the furniture out and moving everything around. There was another great purge and a trailer load of stuff was brought to the dump. The garage got cleaned out and totally reorganized.
The Great Purge of 2012 seems to go so far beyond just the stuff we are getting rid of. Old selves are being cast off. Weight is being lost both physically and mentally. Attitudes are shifting and there is great growth happening. Its an interesting place in life. Only the Lord knows what else this season will bring.
Blessings of flexibility and patience to endure the shifting seasons with grace and wisdom,
the Mrs.
The biggest transition....the biggest change....is that my husband is changing careers. Not just his job. This has been a dream of his for nearly a decade. The Lord orchestrated this timing perfectly and all the doors were flung open for him and the support that rallied around him was so encouraging. This will be a very felt transition for the whole family. He won't be just changing buildings or offices. He will have 4 months of intense study and training - right here in our basement, taking all the classes and tests on-line through the company. It means creating a working, functioning office space for him. It means a diminished income (but we've been planning and saving for this possible opportunity for many years and have a plan), tightening the belts and making choices more thoughtfully. It means he will be home, the commute from home to work will be mere seconds. It means lunches and hugs and learning to respect each others work and work space while sharing it. It means new schedules and volume levels. It means a lot of unknowns and that our attitudes will need to be chosen wisely. It means a big huge transition for him physically and mentally.
The school year means transitioning from seeing our daughter frequently, to very little. Its hard. Hard to have to miss out on the little things we will never get to be part of. Morning routines and kitchen door send offs. It means more phone calls and facebooking. Catching up on the details of her life after the fact.
The school year also means our Dude is in the middle of his own big transition. It's waking up earlier, riding a bus, learning to navigate the hallways and get to classes on time. Dealing with stubborn lockers and learning to play an instrument. Making friends and finding his place. Starting a new youth program and meeting new leaders and students.
For me it means supporting all these people I love so much. It means being aware of where we all are, what the needs are of our family and making sure that the tone set in our home is one that gives them comfort. Making sure that home is a place where they can decompress, relax, refresh and restore from all that stuff that goes on in their day. A place where they can feel free to talk it all through and know that there is someone who is going to listen, help them find a solution or just simply understand the frustration. A place full of hugs and sometimes cookies but always a place where they feel safe to be who they are and have a voice to say what it is they are feeling.
Gosh, even the house itself has gone through some big changes. Dude's room was redecorated. Living room got new furniture and everything was moved around. All the furniture moving changed out a couple of pieces in the dining area. The basement has had a huge face lift just from trading the furniture out and moving everything around. There was another great purge and a trailer load of stuff was brought to the dump. The garage got cleaned out and totally reorganized.
The Great Purge of 2012 seems to go so far beyond just the stuff we are getting rid of. Old selves are being cast off. Weight is being lost both physically and mentally. Attitudes are shifting and there is great growth happening. Its an interesting place in life. Only the Lord knows what else this season will bring.
Blessings of flexibility and patience to endure the shifting seasons with grace and wisdom,
the Mrs.
Monday, August 27, 2012
peace in the season
It feels odd to be in such a state of peace as we move closer to changes and transitions....excited even.
There is a quietness that is settled over me. As programs are rolled out for the fall church season and friends start asking what we will participate in.....I quietly and confidently say "I don't know". Because, I don't. I don't know what fall will bring, I don't know what middle school will look like for Dude. Will he need the down time, more time for homework or will he want to do after school programs? I don't know.....neither do I feel a strong pull toward anything. I simply feel this calm and an ease to go with the flow. That during this season in life I am not to make commitments.
Its a funny feeling to finally feel this settled in my spirit...makes me want to laugh.....perhaps that's the joy bubbling up. I love the season we are in!
I'm excited for our daughter that she is going to be a junior! That she is really coming into her own and has found she loves drama and is actually excited about tryouts. That she's excited about prom already and that she seems to have a new confidence and ease about her.
I'm excited for what middle school will be like for our son. Granted there are many prayers for him that it is NOTHING like my own experience. I love that he is so excited for the opportunities....all the clubs and extras that he wants to participate in (though I have a feeling we will have a conversation about how he can't do them all). I love that he is so relaxed, so at ease and confident at his age. It blows my mind. No nervousness at all....he never has. First day of school? Mom, get a grip, it's no big deal, I can walk myself in. Every year, not once, not even pre-school or kindergarten, would he let me walk him into class. He wanted to do it on his own. The first few years I think it was me who needed my hand held but now, he's taught me over the years that his first day experience is so much different than my own. Mine were full of nerves and questions and what-ifs...but his, relaxed and go with the flow.
As parents, its a new season for us. Our kids are so self sufficient now that I sometimes need to remind myself. We don't need babysitters anymore. That is so weird! The need for us to do things for them has changed and now what they need from us is guidance and teaching to do things on their own, building up their skill set. Its a great mental shift for mom.
I've been working on transitioning our home to better suit older kids and make the basement area function better for them to have friends over. It used to be the grown up hang out and now it's all about the kids. Gotta make it cool!
The household diet is changing so the menus will be changing, the day of the week I shop on has changed and what I buy has changed.
So many areas of transition.
Such great peace.
Blessings of anticipation for what the Lord has in store for you and protection from the desire to do anything but go with it.
the Mrs.
There is a quietness that is settled over me. As programs are rolled out for the fall church season and friends start asking what we will participate in.....I quietly and confidently say "I don't know". Because, I don't. I don't know what fall will bring, I don't know what middle school will look like for Dude. Will he need the down time, more time for homework or will he want to do after school programs? I don't know.....neither do I feel a strong pull toward anything. I simply feel this calm and an ease to go with the flow. That during this season in life I am not to make commitments.
Its a funny feeling to finally feel this settled in my spirit...makes me want to laugh.....perhaps that's the joy bubbling up. I love the season we are in!
I'm excited for our daughter that she is going to be a junior! That she is really coming into her own and has found she loves drama and is actually excited about tryouts. That she's excited about prom already and that she seems to have a new confidence and ease about her.
I'm excited for what middle school will be like for our son. Granted there are many prayers for him that it is NOTHING like my own experience. I love that he is so excited for the opportunities....all the clubs and extras that he wants to participate in (though I have a feeling we will have a conversation about how he can't do them all). I love that he is so relaxed, so at ease and confident at his age. It blows my mind. No nervousness at all....he never has. First day of school? Mom, get a grip, it's no big deal, I can walk myself in. Every year, not once, not even pre-school or kindergarten, would he let me walk him into class. He wanted to do it on his own. The first few years I think it was me who needed my hand held but now, he's taught me over the years that his first day experience is so much different than my own. Mine were full of nerves and questions and what-ifs...but his, relaxed and go with the flow.
As parents, its a new season for us. Our kids are so self sufficient now that I sometimes need to remind myself. We don't need babysitters anymore. That is so weird! The need for us to do things for them has changed and now what they need from us is guidance and teaching to do things on their own, building up their skill set. Its a great mental shift for mom.
I've been working on transitioning our home to better suit older kids and make the basement area function better for them to have friends over. It used to be the grown up hang out and now it's all about the kids. Gotta make it cool!
The household diet is changing so the menus will be changing, the day of the week I shop on has changed and what I buy has changed.
So many areas of transition.
Such great peace.
Blessings of anticipation for what the Lord has in store for you and protection from the desire to do anything but go with it.
the Mrs.
Friday, August 17, 2012
Can YOU say "transition" boys and girls?
There are so many tiers of it going on right now I can't even begin to describe how many places I see it. While that sounds overwhelming - on so many levels - looks overwhelming to type, it feels entirely, unexpectedly different.
I'm loving every moment and living right in the moment of where we are, and not focused on where we might be in the next.
Is this some natural shift that happens in your mid 30's? Or is this my very own God orchestrated transition of the mind? There has been a tremendous mental shift for me in the last months. One that has filled me with a peace and calm that overrides all things. Don't get me wrong, I still get all kinds of anxious when there is way too much going on all at once, but even that is different and more short lived.
Don't waste today on tomorrow....or yesterday.
That seems to sum up where my focus is at. I want to be present in the here and now. In the moments with my family I want them to feel that I was actually there and not drifted off to the next thing. Not leaving them with memories of a wife and mother who was there physically but not actually present and there, for and with them. I am remembering a lot of not just the details and facts of when I was growing up but the feelings I had. The relationships I had with my family......or the complete and utter lack of them. The combination of complete and utter aloneness with the overwhelming pressure of being an axis point to which too many things revolved around. I am realizing as I watch my kids grow, how incredibly blessed they are to have lives that are filled with so little drama that I have to strain to try to understand the magnitude of what is "big" to them. How as a 16 year old I would have done anything to trade lives with my daughter. As an 11 year old......I could only dream to live life as simply and freely as my son does.
There is so much I want to impart to them....so much to share with them....I need to make a way for it to happen.
The weather here has been crisp and cool. So very fall like in nature that even some leaves have changed and fallen. I feel so tuned in to seeing transition right now. Its like this radar has been turned on and even the slightest, most subtle transitions jump out to greet me with this welcome I feel deep in my spirit.
It is the loveliest of times. I feel the most comfortably "me" I have ever felt in my life. The weight of expectation has been cast off....who I am supposed to be has no more importance. Resting in who I am, settling in to see who He is making me into.....safety bar locked and arms up.....just going with the flow and enjoying the ride. Life is different this way. Even the greatest of impending shifts to our lives creates not even a ripple of stress.
Whatever God is up to right now, I'm excited to see whats next.
Blessings to you for arms up joy in the ride of your life,
the Mrs.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
When the Lord comes knockin, you best be ready.
Oh how the Lord speaks and makes me laugh!
Remember how earlier today I said I minister at the kitchen door? Remember how I said I'm in a new comfort with myself and that in the summer I do not achieve anywhere near the productivity I intend and things get all out of whack?
Apparently all of these needed extra highlighting and emphasis today. This morning I intended to take advantage of the morning by getting on the treadmill. So I skipped the shower and intended to take one after being on the treadmill. I intended to do the dishes after said shower so I would have enough hot water. I also intended to make a to do list, start the bible study book I received last week, get the laundry folded and figure out how the carpet cleaner (which was purchased 2 months ago) works, as well as start getting the next few months of calendar ready for the start of school so we are organized going into it.
Here's what actually happened.
I ended my blog post by following up with a couple emails, checking facebook and dropping in on Pinterest. Found a pin on organization which lead me to this post on 52 weeks of organizing where I fell in love and printed out the form to make my own list of 52 organizing projects. I read a bit there and then my guts told me they hadn't eaten yet, so I had elevenses (yes, that's a hobbit meal reference and I use it often and well) at 10am.....the irony is not lost. After lunch I decided I needed to get on to figuring out the calender issue so that I could give a proper answer on whether I could babysit for a friend in August. Putting my calendar together is time consuming with all the different things that need to be consolidated (2 different school district calendars, Mr's work/golf/etc, church, birthdays/anniversaries and WT's parental rotation schedule). The Dude arrived home from school while I was in the center of a calendar whirlwind. He was barely done with lunch when his buddy called to come play.
At this point I considered that I should set things aside and just get to doing other things.....intended things. But not wanting to leave a project unfinished ignored all else....hmm....no to-do list means no ta-daaaa.
So an hour or so later the buddy's mom arrives at my kitchen door. Filling me in on a host of trials going on for their family. I attentively listened and expressed as much encouragement and understanding as I could to someone I'm not well acquainted with and therefore was unsure of what she may need in the moment. The homemaker in me was horrified as my unshowered self stood before the mother of my child's friend, in my SO messy kitchen with the garbage to the top and the recycling poking out (which is of course located in direct eyesight of the entry we are standing in) which was only to be topped by our very senior aged dog walking behind her to vomit in the doorway right behind her. No, I'm not kidding. As I dragged the old dog to the back door to let her outside, in case there was anymore to come up.....I found a present to top off the beautiful experience. One of the little dogs had decided at just that moment to take a poo right there on the kitchen floor. Mortified.
Yes....here in one fell swoop I had an opportunity to minister a new person at my kitchen door while cleaning up poo and vomit off of my kitchen floor, unshowered, hair a mess, no makeup, trying to push dirty vomity poo filled paper towels into a too full garbage can while trying to reassure an overwhelmed mother that her son can come over any time and to please let us know how we can be helpful.
Really? I am surprised she let him stay after she left. After she left and I had time to sit and think about it....all I could do is laugh. Quite the reality check sent in affirmation.
Yes - you do minister at your kitchen door.
Yes - you've gotten comfortable with who you are enough to pick up poo and vomit off the floor in your too messy house and not be overly apologetic or completely insecure about your place in humanity. You did it with grace and without panic or frustration.
Yes - you have slipped in your duties. Yes, you have allowed your home keeping to fall out of priority.
Here is your moment of awareness that you are indeed in a very good place but your inefficiency at your work can compromise the opportunities I give you for ministry, the ones you are very aware are spontaneous. It is your job to just be ready.
Father forgive my procrastination and laziness! I have full confidence that You can turn this messy moment into a good thing.
There's my confession for the day. I was an unprepared mess when the Lord brought someone knocking. I have fallen down on the job and need to totally reassess how I manage my time in an effort to bring balance to keeping home and mommydom.
Blessings of preparedness for when the Lord comes knocking unexpectedly......with the laughter and smile to go with it.
the Mrs.
Remember how earlier today I said I minister at the kitchen door? Remember how I said I'm in a new comfort with myself and that in the summer I do not achieve anywhere near the productivity I intend and things get all out of whack?
Apparently all of these needed extra highlighting and emphasis today. This morning I intended to take advantage of the morning by getting on the treadmill. So I skipped the shower and intended to take one after being on the treadmill. I intended to do the dishes after said shower so I would have enough hot water. I also intended to make a to do list, start the bible study book I received last week, get the laundry folded and figure out how the carpet cleaner (which was purchased 2 months ago) works, as well as start getting the next few months of calendar ready for the start of school so we are organized going into it.
Here's what actually happened.
I ended my blog post by following up with a couple emails, checking facebook and dropping in on Pinterest. Found a pin on organization which lead me to this post on 52 weeks of organizing where I fell in love and printed out the form to make my own list of 52 organizing projects. I read a bit there and then my guts told me they hadn't eaten yet, so I had elevenses (yes, that's a hobbit meal reference and I use it often and well) at 10am.....the irony is not lost. After lunch I decided I needed to get on to figuring out the calender issue so that I could give a proper answer on whether I could babysit for a friend in August. Putting my calendar together is time consuming with all the different things that need to be consolidated (2 different school district calendars, Mr's work/golf/etc, church, birthdays/anniversaries and WT's parental rotation schedule). The Dude arrived home from school while I was in the center of a calendar whirlwind. He was barely done with lunch when his buddy called to come play.
At this point I considered that I should set things aside and just get to doing other things.....intended things. But not wanting to leave a project unfinished ignored all else....hmm....no to-do list means no ta-daaaa.
So an hour or so later the buddy's mom arrives at my kitchen door. Filling me in on a host of trials going on for their family. I attentively listened and expressed as much encouragement and understanding as I could to someone I'm not well acquainted with and therefore was unsure of what she may need in the moment. The homemaker in me was horrified as my unshowered self stood before the mother of my child's friend, in my SO messy kitchen with the garbage to the top and the recycling poking out (which is of course located in direct eyesight of the entry we are standing in) which was only to be topped by our very senior aged dog walking behind her to vomit in the doorway right behind her. No, I'm not kidding. As I dragged the old dog to the back door to let her outside, in case there was anymore to come up.....I found a present to top off the beautiful experience. One of the little dogs had decided at just that moment to take a poo right there on the kitchen floor. Mortified.
Yes....here in one fell swoop I had an opportunity to minister a new person at my kitchen door while cleaning up poo and vomit off of my kitchen floor, unshowered, hair a mess, no makeup, trying to push dirty vomity poo filled paper towels into a too full garbage can while trying to reassure an overwhelmed mother that her son can come over any time and to please let us know how we can be helpful.
Really? I am surprised she let him stay after she left. After she left and I had time to sit and think about it....all I could do is laugh. Quite the reality check sent in affirmation.
Yes - you do minister at your kitchen door.
Yes - you've gotten comfortable with who you are enough to pick up poo and vomit off the floor in your too messy house and not be overly apologetic or completely insecure about your place in humanity. You did it with grace and without panic or frustration.
Yes - you have slipped in your duties. Yes, you have allowed your home keeping to fall out of priority.
Here is your moment of awareness that you are indeed in a very good place but your inefficiency at your work can compromise the opportunities I give you for ministry, the ones you are very aware are spontaneous. It is your job to just be ready.
Father forgive my procrastination and laziness! I have full confidence that You can turn this messy moment into a good thing.
There's my confession for the day. I was an unprepared mess when the Lord brought someone knocking. I have fallen down on the job and need to totally reassess how I manage my time in an effort to bring balance to keeping home and mommydom.
Blessings of preparedness for when the Lord comes knocking unexpectedly......with the laughter and smile to go with it.
the Mrs.
a new era welcomed
The winds of change are coming. I can feel them. Transition into a new season for our family.
No more elementary school. No more need for babysitters. The boy has a J O B for goodness sake!
Wonderteen will be a Junior. 11th grade. Amazing to think my tiny little pumpkin head has grown into such an amazing and beautiful young woman.
Mr and I are entering into a new era. Older kids. More freedom to be spontaneously social and building a new core of relationships. Our marriage continually growing stronger....and in a way makes me laugh at how we've grown into this beautiful relationship that also mimics the intensity of young love. We often tease our daughter and her boyfriend about that high school love where things are so intense you immediately miss each other when out of sight. Time apart can be crushing. Oh the days of young overwhelming love! ...and we discuss on a fairly regular basis how wonderful retirement will be when we can be together all the time or his regular comment that if only we could win the lottery so he could be home with me everyday. The million times we say I love you, sometimes less than 5 minutes apart...yes, that is our truth. We are silly, cavity inducing, head over heels crazy for each other. And we don't care how many times people tell us to get a room. Our affection is not hidden, nor excessive. We keep it G people....maybe PG sometimes. :)
In this new era the trappings of formal ministry obligations have been thrown off. The kind that tie you to a place, time and topic. Nothing wrong with them, I'm not being critical of formal ministry. As I've gotten older I have become more and more aware that I am personally in a constant state of ministry. Some refer to my maternal nature with those around me. It brings me to minister to whomever is in front of me at the time. It isn't conscious or premeditated.....it is simply how He has grown me, wired me. Formal ministry wears on me more quickly than I'd like to admit because of this. My ministry is my family, my home and whomever may be placed in my path. Facebook is so trivialized but I have spent more time ministering to people on there than you may believe. I minister via email and kitchen door. Yes, I have a young man who just shows up at my kitchen door, unannounced and just to talk. He is 20 years old now, he calls me mom and has been showing up for several years.
Perhaps is the natural growth of being in the second half of my 30's. Or maybe it's that I'm in a season in life more typical for one in their 40's. Maybe it's my confidence coming forward with over 30lbs shed. Either way I feel a new settling in myself. A disinterest to please simply for the sake of keeping others happy or not tarnishing someones view of me. Who they think I am does not make me who I am....anymore. Its a lovely freedom.
I will probably always be a one track person. Whatever current focus will probably always be THE big deal until it isn't anymore.
I am not a crafty person. I won't pick up scrap booking or stamping. I am capable of crafts but that does not make me crafty.
My kids school work will still be mostly thrown in the trash. Because who really looks at their spelling tests from 4th grade? This isn't a treasure to me. Exceptional works of art from them, yes. Essays that depict who they are or their unique point of view at the time, those are things I will keep for them. The funny, the deep, the personal, the beautiful. Perhaps that's cold. Though I take great pride in watching my 11 year old purge objects more efficiently than any adult I know because he doesn't form deep emotional connections to objects. He loves people and that is where love should go.
I'll always have a horribly immature sense of humor. And that is okay.
I'll always be strong and stable.
I'll always have a heart that breaks easily.
I'll always be a homebody who loves, loves, loves solitude and quiet.
I'll always be passionate about the truth but frustratingly calm and non-argumentative.
I will always care about doing what is right more than what is popular.
I will always be trying to grow and improve and learn about something.
There is unknown on the horizon but it's not scary. The Lord always has a plan and it is always amazing. The only plan I have is to try and walk through it with as much joy and grace as I can, no matter how things feel. Feelings are deceiving and often not rooted in truth. A fact that is hard to remember when we are in the middle of them but it is something good to remember.
It's been a good couple weeks here. Lots of fun, lots of crazy and lots of me remembering how every summer I think I'm going to accomplish SO much and never do because I simply can't get it done while my kids are home. They want attention and talk time or maybe just hanging out not talking time. If that is what they need then that is what I try to give them, with measures of work in between. The school year is my most productive home keeping season. This year I hate to say even the garden has not been tended to the way it deserves. It has been a disgustingly hot and humid summer though.....I have not wanted to even venture out there.
Time to get some work done. This is the last week of summer school and Wonderteen is off on a trip with her mom and girl scout troop this week. My last week of any alone time. I want to make the most of it!
Blessings of peace and calm to welcome whatever new era comes to greet you.
the Mrs.
No more elementary school. No more need for babysitters. The boy has a J O B for goodness sake!
Wonderteen will be a Junior. 11th grade. Amazing to think my tiny little pumpkin head has grown into such an amazing and beautiful young woman.
Mr and I are entering into a new era. Older kids. More freedom to be spontaneously social and building a new core of relationships. Our marriage continually growing stronger....and in a way makes me laugh at how we've grown into this beautiful relationship that also mimics the intensity of young love. We often tease our daughter and her boyfriend about that high school love where things are so intense you immediately miss each other when out of sight. Time apart can be crushing. Oh the days of young overwhelming love! ...and we discuss on a fairly regular basis how wonderful retirement will be when we can be together all the time or his regular comment that if only we could win the lottery so he could be home with me everyday. The million times we say I love you, sometimes less than 5 minutes apart...yes, that is our truth. We are silly, cavity inducing, head over heels crazy for each other. And we don't care how many times people tell us to get a room. Our affection is not hidden, nor excessive. We keep it G people....maybe PG sometimes. :)
In this new era the trappings of formal ministry obligations have been thrown off. The kind that tie you to a place, time and topic. Nothing wrong with them, I'm not being critical of formal ministry. As I've gotten older I have become more and more aware that I am personally in a constant state of ministry. Some refer to my maternal nature with those around me. It brings me to minister to whomever is in front of me at the time. It isn't conscious or premeditated.....it is simply how He has grown me, wired me. Formal ministry wears on me more quickly than I'd like to admit because of this. My ministry is my family, my home and whomever may be placed in my path. Facebook is so trivialized but I have spent more time ministering to people on there than you may believe. I minister via email and kitchen door. Yes, I have a young man who just shows up at my kitchen door, unannounced and just to talk. He is 20 years old now, he calls me mom and has been showing up for several years.
Perhaps is the natural growth of being in the second half of my 30's. Or maybe it's that I'm in a season in life more typical for one in their 40's. Maybe it's my confidence coming forward with over 30lbs shed. Either way I feel a new settling in myself. A disinterest to please simply for the sake of keeping others happy or not tarnishing someones view of me. Who they think I am does not make me who I am....anymore. Its a lovely freedom.
I will probably always be a one track person. Whatever current focus will probably always be THE big deal until it isn't anymore.
I am not a crafty person. I won't pick up scrap booking or stamping. I am capable of crafts but that does not make me crafty.
My kids school work will still be mostly thrown in the trash. Because who really looks at their spelling tests from 4th grade? This isn't a treasure to me. Exceptional works of art from them, yes. Essays that depict who they are or their unique point of view at the time, those are things I will keep for them. The funny, the deep, the personal, the beautiful. Perhaps that's cold. Though I take great pride in watching my 11 year old purge objects more efficiently than any adult I know because he doesn't form deep emotional connections to objects. He loves people and that is where love should go.
I'll always have a horribly immature sense of humor. And that is okay.
I'll always be strong and stable.
I'll always have a heart that breaks easily.
I'll always be a homebody who loves, loves, loves solitude and quiet.
I'll always be passionate about the truth but frustratingly calm and non-argumentative.
I will always care about doing what is right more than what is popular.
I will always be trying to grow and improve and learn about something.
There is unknown on the horizon but it's not scary. The Lord always has a plan and it is always amazing. The only plan I have is to try and walk through it with as much joy and grace as I can, no matter how things feel. Feelings are deceiving and often not rooted in truth. A fact that is hard to remember when we are in the middle of them but it is something good to remember.
It's been a good couple weeks here. Lots of fun, lots of crazy and lots of me remembering how every summer I think I'm going to accomplish SO much and never do because I simply can't get it done while my kids are home. They want attention and talk time or maybe just hanging out not talking time. If that is what they need then that is what I try to give them, with measures of work in between. The school year is my most productive home keeping season. This year I hate to say even the garden has not been tended to the way it deserves. It has been a disgustingly hot and humid summer though.....I have not wanted to even venture out there.
Time to get some work done. This is the last week of summer school and Wonderteen is off on a trip with her mom and girl scout troop this week. My last week of any alone time. I want to make the most of it!
Blessings of peace and calm to welcome whatever new era comes to greet you.
the Mrs.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Making memories
The Drive-in is a near extinct experience. There are not too many left.....in our state maybe only 3-4.
Its sad that one day the drive-in will only exist in history books.
There is one about an hour from us here. Its very family oriented, no movies over PG-13, pets welcome, bring your own food and you can even bring a small propane grill to make dinner! I've seen people bring folding tables and chairs and serve dinner out of a crock pot. We've brought dinner in a crock pot ourselves a time or two. It's like a small community that sets up for just a few hours. If someone bigger than you arrives and blocks your view, you can pack up and move a spot or two to clear your view.
We make a real point to go several times during the summer. Sure we could show up, find an available spot and watch the movie sitting in our car....but....that's not what we do. We pack the car like we are leaving for the weekend. Lawn chairs, cooler, bug spray, blankets, speakers, bags of treats, games.....STUFF.
Sit in the car? Noooo.....not us.
We arrive near the time the gates open so we can pick a good spot, away from lights, near the bathrooms. The car is backed into the chosen spot, tailgate open and layered with blankets and cushions for the kids. A cooler is packed with beverages, fruit, candy and whatever baked treats I came up with. Mr and I sit in our lawn chairs with the kids old toddler ones in front of us as foot rests. This year we may even have an extra speaker hooked up to put on the ground in front of us to enhance the sound. Blankets and sweatshirts come out as the air gets chilly and everyone slowly gets doused in bug spray. If the night is clear, we point out shooting stars and that the refinery off in the distance looks like a sparkling crystal city.....which is so opposite of what it is. But at night, from far away, it is beautiful.
Its always at least a double feature. This weekend it's the Avengers and Mission Impossible. Great combo! Lots of adventure and explody scenes on the huge screen! Most often the night ends with me waking up to realize I didn't see 70% of the second movie and giggles that mom was snoring. The kids fall asleep in the back and we don't arrive back home until near 3am. We all fall into bed exhausted but having had the best night.
Saturday night will be this years first venture out for what looks to be this drive-in's last season. Memories in the making. One day when the kids are grown we'll be telling their kids about how we used to drive far away just to watch movies outside.
Hopefully the weather will cooperate this weekend. We are all excited about the first trip out. I'm baking like crazy so we have fun treats. I'm not telling what though cuz I know my Mr will be reading and the surprise will be ruined. :)
Blessings to you for a multitude of memory making opportunities,
the Mrs.
Its sad that one day the drive-in will only exist in history books.
There is one about an hour from us here. Its very family oriented, no movies over PG-13, pets welcome, bring your own food and you can even bring a small propane grill to make dinner! I've seen people bring folding tables and chairs and serve dinner out of a crock pot. We've brought dinner in a crock pot ourselves a time or two. It's like a small community that sets up for just a few hours. If someone bigger than you arrives and blocks your view, you can pack up and move a spot or two to clear your view.
We make a real point to go several times during the summer. Sure we could show up, find an available spot and watch the movie sitting in our car....but....that's not what we do. We pack the car like we are leaving for the weekend. Lawn chairs, cooler, bug spray, blankets, speakers, bags of treats, games.....STUFF.
Sit in the car? Noooo.....not us.
We arrive near the time the gates open so we can pick a good spot, away from lights, near the bathrooms. The car is backed into the chosen spot, tailgate open and layered with blankets and cushions for the kids. A cooler is packed with beverages, fruit, candy and whatever baked treats I came up with. Mr and I sit in our lawn chairs with the kids old toddler ones in front of us as foot rests. This year we may even have an extra speaker hooked up to put on the ground in front of us to enhance the sound. Blankets and sweatshirts come out as the air gets chilly and everyone slowly gets doused in bug spray. If the night is clear, we point out shooting stars and that the refinery off in the distance looks like a sparkling crystal city.....which is so opposite of what it is. But at night, from far away, it is beautiful.
Its always at least a double feature. This weekend it's the Avengers and Mission Impossible. Great combo! Lots of adventure and explody scenes on the huge screen! Most often the night ends with me waking up to realize I didn't see 70% of the second movie and giggles that mom was snoring. The kids fall asleep in the back and we don't arrive back home until near 3am. We all fall into bed exhausted but having had the best night.
Saturday night will be this years first venture out for what looks to be this drive-in's last season. Memories in the making. One day when the kids are grown we'll be telling their kids about how we used to drive far away just to watch movies outside.
Hopefully the weather will cooperate this weekend. We are all excited about the first trip out. I'm baking like crazy so we have fun treats. I'm not telling what though cuz I know my Mr will be reading and the surprise will be ruined. :)
Blessings to you for a multitude of memory making opportunities,
the Mrs.
Monday, April 30, 2012
a different monday.....a break to reboot and rekindle
Time for a switch. I think I've been taking mental multitasking to a whole new level.....at least for me. I need to slow it down and cut a few things out. I determined that I'm taking a vacation from weight-loss.
What does that mean? No counting. No treadmill - unless I have a genuine desire to....but lets be real, it's unlikely to happen. No pressure. My LIFE is about paying attention to food, what I eat, how much I eat, when I eat, how it makes me feel, what ingredients have changed and how I need to counteract it all. It's a full time job all on its own. I think I need to step away so I can return with a refreshed desire for the goal. The family challenge that we set about a month ago is off. No one was really taking it seriously and it didn't have the motivational desire we thought it would. Mr is going to continue to do his own thing and keep going.
I'm still going to weigh in every Monday like I have for the last year. I'm not going to report it here for now though. I'm still going to be watching what I eat and how much but I'm going to be focusing in a bit more on the balance of plants to grains....less of the white food and more of the colorful stuff.
Yesterday I watched "Food Matters" and "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" and rebooted my attitude with food and why I need to be vigilant about what I eat. Along with my attitude, my passion was rebooted. I think that is something we all need from time to time. We can get into a rut with our routines and the monotony of our own normalcy. The shine and the passion can dull a bit bringing the need to go back to the roots, the beginnings of why we do what we do. Renewal is good. I really don't have a choice about how I eat, but I have a choice about how I look at it....what my attitude is. These were excellent films on their own but they were especially good reminders for me. A rekindling of the passion and joy that is found in eating natural whole foods and squelching the feeling of it being work.
My attention is needed in more important areas than my waistline. The Great Purge of 2012 must go on as well as the reorganizing that needs attending to. As our family merges into a new era of life, its time to re-evaluate the efficiency of all the areas in our home so we can move into the next season ready to take on all the new challenges it may offer. The Dude has his room re-do coming up - now that colors have finally been chosen. We are in the very early stages of planning a screen porch build on the back patio....we will be building it with the generous help of friends time and energy. We are planning a sweet 16 birthday party for our WonderTeen and there is just so much family goodness going on in all these things.
For now, this season, my focus is on slowing down. Doing what I do with intention and joy. Purging not just our home of clutter, but my mind of hurry and life of excess. Loving the process and the people it's all for.
While "weight-loss" and I may be on a break, I think I'll have lots of other things to chat about.
Blessings of a slowed down love bringing you back to your roots,
the Mrs.
What does that mean? No counting. No treadmill - unless I have a genuine desire to....but lets be real, it's unlikely to happen. No pressure. My LIFE is about paying attention to food, what I eat, how much I eat, when I eat, how it makes me feel, what ingredients have changed and how I need to counteract it all. It's a full time job all on its own. I think I need to step away so I can return with a refreshed desire for the goal. The family challenge that we set about a month ago is off. No one was really taking it seriously and it didn't have the motivational desire we thought it would. Mr is going to continue to do his own thing and keep going.
I'm still going to weigh in every Monday like I have for the last year. I'm not going to report it here for now though. I'm still going to be watching what I eat and how much but I'm going to be focusing in a bit more on the balance of plants to grains....less of the white food and more of the colorful stuff.
Yesterday I watched "Food Matters" and "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" and rebooted my attitude with food and why I need to be vigilant about what I eat. Along with my attitude, my passion was rebooted. I think that is something we all need from time to time. We can get into a rut with our routines and the monotony of our own normalcy. The shine and the passion can dull a bit bringing the need to go back to the roots, the beginnings of why we do what we do. Renewal is good. I really don't have a choice about how I eat, but I have a choice about how I look at it....what my attitude is. These were excellent films on their own but they were especially good reminders for me. A rekindling of the passion and joy that is found in eating natural whole foods and squelching the feeling of it being work.
My attention is needed in more important areas than my waistline. The Great Purge of 2012 must go on as well as the reorganizing that needs attending to. As our family merges into a new era of life, its time to re-evaluate the efficiency of all the areas in our home so we can move into the next season ready to take on all the new challenges it may offer. The Dude has his room re-do coming up - now that colors have finally been chosen. We are in the very early stages of planning a screen porch build on the back patio....we will be building it with the generous help of friends time and energy. We are planning a sweet 16 birthday party for our WonderTeen and there is just so much family goodness going on in all these things.
For now, this season, my focus is on slowing down. Doing what I do with intention and joy. Purging not just our home of clutter, but my mind of hurry and life of excess. Loving the process and the people it's all for.
While "weight-loss" and I may be on a break, I think I'll have lots of other things to chat about.
Blessings of a slowed down love bringing you back to your roots,
the Mrs.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
beginning the great purge of 2012
Storage tubs are set out upstairs and down. I've begun.
Funny thing is, I am seeing my perspective change. Things I've kept because they were someone else's....but don't hold a true purpose...don't hold meaning anymore. Now, they are space invaders. I also found my first "didn't remember I had that" treasure. A pretty set of antique silver in a silverware chest that I'd thought was empty. I'm guessing they have been in that box for 10 years. It was a set of my grandmothers that my mother gave me when I came to help her purge her own home....she died a few short months later.
Since making the decision that this will be our forever home, I've got lots of things I want to do. Not many are very big but would make a big impact. As I drive past "for sale" signs on some of my favorite roads, that familiar thought to look up the property when I get home hits....but it's followed with a "why?" I have had to remind myself I'm not going to move. Then I laugh.
"Temporary" seems to be the way people live now. We live in homes "for now" until we find one that is bigger and "better". We purchase things in disposable containers, we buy things because they are temporary and we won't have to do anything with them later. Cars aren't driven until they die, only until the cool factor does. Clothes are not worn until they are no longer useful but until they are out of style. Everything is temporary. Our appliances are built to be replaced, so are our cars and clothes, dishes and furniture. The sole purpose of the things that are produced now is to fail after a short time so they can be purchased again.
It's disturbing.
I began to realize just how that had gotten into my head. That I'd never thought of anywhere we'd lived....I'd lived....as a permanent residence. It didn't occur to me that I wouldn't move again. There were things I did and didn't do with our home because of that very fact. There is resale to consider and why put in extra work on something if you won't be the benefactor? I'm seeing it all very different now. It feels different. Maybe because this is my workplace and my home. Perhaps it's a stage in life, a marker that each of us hits at some point and it isn't at all unique to my experience.
Whatever it is, I like it. Home seems to have a bit of a different ring to it.
Blessings to you for new joy in the old stuff,
the Mrs.
It
Funny thing is, I am seeing my perspective change. Things I've kept because they were someone else's....but don't hold a true purpose...don't hold meaning anymore. Now, they are space invaders. I also found my first "didn't remember I had that" treasure. A pretty set of antique silver in a silverware chest that I'd thought was empty. I'm guessing they have been in that box for 10 years. It was a set of my grandmothers that my mother gave me when I came to help her purge her own home....she died a few short months later.
Since making the decision that this will be our forever home, I've got lots of things I want to do. Not many are very big but would make a big impact. As I drive past "for sale" signs on some of my favorite roads, that familiar thought to look up the property when I get home hits....but it's followed with a "why?" I have had to remind myself I'm not going to move. Then I laugh.
"Temporary" seems to be the way people live now. We live in homes "for now" until we find one that is bigger and "better". We purchase things in disposable containers, we buy things because they are temporary and we won't have to do anything with them later. Cars aren't driven until they die, only until the cool factor does. Clothes are not worn until they are no longer useful but until they are out of style. Everything is temporary. Our appliances are built to be replaced, so are our cars and clothes, dishes and furniture. The sole purpose of the things that are produced now is to fail after a short time so they can be purchased again.
It's disturbing.
I began to realize just how that had gotten into my head. That I'd never thought of anywhere we'd lived....I'd lived....as a permanent residence. It didn't occur to me that I wouldn't move again. There were things I did and didn't do with our home because of that very fact. There is resale to consider and why put in extra work on something if you won't be the benefactor? I'm seeing it all very different now. It feels different. Maybe because this is my workplace and my home. Perhaps it's a stage in life, a marker that each of us hits at some point and it isn't at all unique to my experience.
Whatever it is, I like it. Home seems to have a bit of a different ring to it.
Blessings to you for new joy in the old stuff,
the Mrs.
It
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
whooops....
I don't know if anyone noticed that I didn't post yesterday.....but I didn't.
Sorry. I was distracted by attempting to be more productive and efficient with my time because I have noticed that my work has been slipping. That kind of thing is always terrifically highlighted with the impending arrival of visitors. Though my awareness was there already but.....magnified by the fact that people would actually be here. With kids. And helping my hubby to fix things we have no idea how to fix.....which means closing doors and keeping the lights off won't do the trick this time.
Since downsizing our cable package to only one box (the DVR must be saved) the basement doesn't get used so much. It had become a catchall for random things that just weren't used or needed a halfway house before they were donated. It feels nice to walk through now and it looks like our house again.
I've made myself some lists. Things I need to reorganize, rooms, cupboards, closets....areas that have been neglected and "caught" too many items waiting for a final home. I use to pride myself of the efficiency of how I ran the house. I'm not sure where I lost that but I am determined to find it again. It's time to purge and simplify this home we've decided will be the place we stay. We won't be moving again. We came to the conclusion that by the time the market turned around or we were able to right-side-up our mortgage, the kids would more than likely be out of the house (or close to it) and it would just be us anyway. We don't need more space and I would have a hard time leaving my kitchen and garden.
I'm slowly working my way through Rhonda's book, savoring each morsel and at just the right moment, when I was pondering what our future plans might be, I read this: "Let me be very clear about this: buying a simple home that is within your budget and can be modified to suit you and your family is the best investment." There was a tremendous amount of wisdom to be found after that too but the logic here was beyond argument. Stay put and modify where you already are.
I know what it is to be in need and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Him that strengthens me.
Phil. 4:12-13
Its interesting to start looking around - for the first time - and have to remind myself that we can make changes and not think about how it will affect "resale value" because we are settling in. This place is ours to shape and change to what suits US. Its a really comforting feeling.
Perhaps just what I needed to reignite my motivation in my work.
Here's yesterdays weigh in details:
A whopping -.2 but a loss is a loss right! The whole family lost, which is good but collectively the three of us lost 1 whole pound. That is rather sad. I think motivation has taken a vacation. We need to call it back home!
Blessings of warmth and springy blossomy goodness to you,
the Mrs
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